In some countries celebrities complain about way about the way media publicize their private lives. Some people say that they should accept it as part of their fame. Do you agree or disagree?

#countries #celebrities #media #lives #people #part #fame

Privacy is essential

needs

Fix the agreement mistake

need

show examples

for

human

Fix the agreement mistake

humans

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Therefore

I believe that every person including celebrities should have their own privacy and can choose which part of their private

lives

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

to be shared and open

for

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show examples

public

Correct article usage

the public

show examples

. Some may argue that as a public

figure

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figures

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along with

their

professioal

Correct your spelling

professional

work

, their private

lives

also

Add a missing verb

are also

show examples

for

public's

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public

show examples

entertaintment

Correct your spelling

entertainment

This

goes as a

consequency

Correct your spelling

consequence

for their fame. As far as I know, many people in different countries have

this

kind of opinion. Public

always

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is always

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curious about their

idol's

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idols'

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private

lives

eventhough

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even though

sometimes their private

lives

does

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

not affect their

work

. Personally speaking, as long as they

work

professionally, their private issues would not

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

matter. Without a doubt personal area is important because I believe every human being have their own secret that they did not want to share.

For instance

, when the secret

come

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comes

show examples

out to

public

Add an article

the public

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there are some kind of uncomfortable feelings that can affect someone's mental health if they are not ready with the responses. The watcher will have some different views on the issue, some will

saying

Wrong verb form

say

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good

while

others will talking bad. In conclusion, as privacy is a basic human need it is important to respect someone's private

lives

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life

show examples

Additionally

Add a comma

,Additionally

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the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

private

Replace the word

privacy

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issues are not affecting

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

professional

work

, we as

public

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the public

show examples

should not

trying

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try

be trying

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so hard to dig down

what

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into what

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is happening in an idol's private

lives

Fix the agreement mistake

life

show examples

Submitted by prawitacandrasari on Mon Feb 06 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

232 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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In some countries celebrities complain about way about the way media publicize their private lives. Some people say that they should accept it as part of their fame. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Due to availability of fast food nowadays, many people have low-quality diets. What problem can this cause? What can governments do to resolve these problems?

life now is better than in the past? what do you think?

With the development of technology, children are now living in a world that is completely different from what it was 50 years ago. What problems does this cause for society and the family? what are the solutions to remove these?

Some people think that it's a good idea to socialize with work colleagues during evenings and weekends. Other people think it's important to keep working life completely separate from social life.

Some people think the government should focus on improving the economy of the country. Other people think that government should focus on social services such as health and education programs. Which statement do you agree with? Explain and provide examples to support your opinion.