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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The bar chart provides information about how often people in the USA spent ate fast food from 2003 to 2013.

The bar chart provides information about how often people in the USA spent ate fast food from 2003 to 2013.
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The provided bar graph compares how often folks in the USA consumed fast
food
Use synonyms
 in 2003,2006 and 2013.
Overall
Linking Words
, the percentage was reduced throughout the time period and each year the highest trend was to go to a restaurant at least once a week or one/two times per month.
Firstly
Linking Words
, there were just under 5% of people who eats fast
food
Use synonyms
 every day,
while
Linking Words
 the percentage declined
further
Linking Words
 in 2013.
Besides
Linking Words
, the number of people who visited a junk
food
Use synonyms
 restaurant several times a week was approximately 17% in 2003 and climbed to 20% in 2006
then
Linking Words
 declined to about 16%. Following a similar pattern, in 2003, more than 30% ate fast
food
Use synonyms
 and increased closer to 33% by 2006 and dropped to around 27%.
However
Linking Words
, the number of people who ate junk
food
Use synonyms
 once or twice a month increased from 30% to 33% approximately,
while
Linking Words
 experiencing a dip of 25% in 2006.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, fast
food
Use synonyms
 consumers who visited a restaurant a few times a year began at around 12% and went up to 15% and remained the same.
Finally
Linking Words
, it shows a decrement in folks who never ate
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 fast
food
Use synonyms
 category which was less than 5%.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words food with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "declined" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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