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Band 5

Today people live longer after retiring from work. What problems does this cause for individuals and society? What can be done?

#people #work #individuals #society
With the improved medical facilities ,now the life span of the population has increased to almost 80 plus.
This
 can create some imbalance in the population and ministry.
This
 essay shall discuss the problems and some suggestions to alleviate the drawbacks. First of all,even though folk are living more,most of them are having one or more ailments which need treatment or medication continuously.So most of them need financial assistance to survive, which is a great burden to the
government
.Those who are retired from the public sector will be given a pension,but those in the private sector may or may not get their retirement amount.
Moreover
,if communities are living longer means the
government
 has to increase taxes,which in turn will affect the youth population.Anyways we should not consider our grandparents as a burden
,
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but should find some solution to make their retirement life fruitful .
However
,not only the union but
also
 non-governmental organisations can play a major role in reducing the problems caused by
this
 .Authority can raise funds and can build some aged homes where those who are interested and healthy can work and others can take a rest.If the
government
 is providing free accommodation and food in a good atmosphere,they can get benefits for the different aged people.Some people will be good at writing
while
 some will be
a
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good
artists
Correct the article-noun agreement
artist
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.The
government
 can sell their piece of art and gain money which can be used for these populations well being.Without imposing taxes or other things , the regime can improve their life at the same time ,youth won't be affected by
this
.
To conclude
 ,our older generation should not be considered a burden even if they are living longer .law should peep into
this
 matter and find some methods by which both young and old should not be affected.
Submitted by sujitharavi85 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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