Extreme sports such as skydiving and skiing are very dangerous and should be banned.

In recent years extreme

sports

Use synonyms

have become well-known in some parts of the world. Some

people

Use synonyms

argue that these should be banned.

This

Linking Words

is because these are very dangerous for

people

Use synonyms

However

Linking Words

Change preposition

apply

show examples

for me, it has pros and cons. In the first place,

sports

Use synonyms

are not as dangerous as many

people

Use synonyms

believe.

Sport

Change the noun form

Sports

show examples

games

Use synonyms

are beneficial to

people

Use synonyms

's health.

For example

Linking Words

, it has plenty

types

Change preposition

of types

show examples

games

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as football, basketball,

volleyball

Correct word choice

and volleyball

show examples

, and

also

Linking Words

, extreme

sports

Use synonyms

are skydiving, skiing, and others.

However

Linking Words

, these are not perilous. Just, it can help individuals to be healthy, be brave, and

also

Linking Words

, it may help to boost their moods.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, it causes

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

broadens the horizon of inhabitants.

Moreover

Linking Words

, these

games

Use synonyms

are become

Change to the active voice

become

have become

show examples

increasingly popular in the world.

Besides

Linking Words

, anyone who wants to try skydiving or skiing will need to sign up for lessons. The administration provided all of the

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

courses with

necessary

Add an article

the necessary

show examples

equipment.

That is

Linking Words

why citizens are curious

Change preposition

about

show examples

this

Linking Words

In addition

Linking Words

, there are some disadvantages as well.

For instance

Linking Words

, if somebody wants to make an effort to these

sports

Use synonyms

, but

Correct subject-verb agreement

does

show examples

not know about

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

and

Correct word choice

show examples

how

play

Add the particle

to play

show examples

these

games

Use synonyms

, it will be dangerous and difficult for them. What is more,

firstly

Linking Words

, folks should take part

Change preposition

show examples

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

clubs. And

also

Linking Words

, they should all be free to decide how they spend their leisure time. So, in some

countries

Add a comma

,countries

show examples

some perilous plays, and dangerous situations are strictly forbidden.

Finally

Linking Words

, multitudes do not want that politicians must stop them

enjoying

Change preposition

from enjoying

show examples

these perilous and useful plays. Taking everything into account, in my perception, I do not believe that these plays are dangerous for mankind. And

also

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

should not be prohibited.

omondavlat91

Feb 13, 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

279 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

Extreme sports
Dangerous
Banned
Agree
Disagree
View
Definition
Popularity
Advantages
Disadvantages
Dangers
Personal choice
Responsibility
Balancing
Risks
Benefits

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

8.5
band
Some school leavers go traveling or work for a period of time instead of going directly to university. Do you think this has more advantages, or disadvantages on their study
In this ever-changing world, the issue of whether high school graduates should go on a trip or work compared to directly entering universities is a matter of debate. While there are compelling arguments on the disadvantages of this behaviour, I firmly believe that it has more advantages for their study.
6.5
band
Topic: Some people say that traffic accidents are caused by the increasing number of motorbikes. Other blame for man’s fault. Which point of view do you agree ?
In recent years, traffic accidents have been a noticeable problem not only in Vietnam but also throughout the world. While a school of thought holds that the rise in the number of motorbikes is a major reason, others still believe that what directly results in this alarming trend is human errors. From my perspective, although the upward trend of motorbike consumption does lead to this issue, man's misbehaviours remain the core of this trend.
7
band
In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this ? how can people research this ?
The historical aspects associated with any real estate make that property a valuable asset. Hence, a significant amount of people are heavily indulged in researching about their houses and buildings in which they reside. There are several factors associated with such a type of movement.
8
band
You saw an advertisement for a tennis course in England but you have one or two problems and can’t stay the whole course. Write a letter to the course director. In your letter: explain your interest in the course describe your problems find out if a refund is possible
I hope you are in radiant health. My name is Lisa, a student in your 9th batch summer tennis course. I am writing this email with a disheartening feeling that unfortunately due to an emergency, I am not able to finish the course.
7.5
band
Some people believe that they should be able to keep all the money they earn and should not pay tax to the state. Do you agree or disagree?
Over the past few decades, there has been a common belief that one should be allowed to keep as much money as one earns and not be taxed by authorities. The writer, however, remains unconvinced because of the rich’s responsibility for social development, despite those emphasizing the over-reliance of the poor.

Extreme sports such as skydiving and skiing are very dangerous and should be banned.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some school leavers go traveling or work for a period of time instead of going directly to university. Do you think this has more advantages, or disadvantages on their study

Topic: Some people say that traffic accidents are caused by the increasing number of motorbikes. Other blame for man’s fault. Which point of view do you agree ?

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this ? how can people research this ?

You saw an advertisement for a tennis course in England but you have one or two problems and can’t stay the whole course. Write a letter to the course director. In your letter: explain your interest in the course describe your problems find out if a refund is possible

Some people believe that they should be able to keep all the money they earn and should not pay tax to the state. Do you agree or disagree?