Present a written argument or case to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the following topic. Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such things as food and education? Or is it the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves? Use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and with relevant evidence.

#argument #case #reader #specialist #topic #nations #wealth #food #education #responsibility #governments #citizens #support #arguments #evidence

In recent times, various forms of

Music

connect each and every individual globally.

Music

keeps a human being happy and

relax

Wrong verb form

relaxed

show examples

irrespective of the situation.

Furthermore

, I believe international

music

is becoming extremely popular against the traditional

music

of a particular nation.

Music

plays a key role in a person's life by spreading happiness and relaxation. The current generation opts for multiple careers to earn money,

as a result

, expose to various lifestyle diseases,

for example

, hypertension,

myopia

Correct word choice

and myopia

show examples

. It's the

music

which helps an individual to keep fighting and working as an inspiration during their highs and lows.

In addition

, it can help you to concentrate on your studies and help achieve your task faster,

for instance

, I used to solve mathematics problems

while

listening to

music

. The primary reason why traditional art is captured by international art is digital connectivity. Before

digital

Add an article

the digital

show examples

transformation, people were restricted to their local arts, but after the evolution of

internet

Add an article

the internet

show examples

, one can listen to a video or audio from any part of the world.

For example

, though I am from India, I only listen to Spanish songs as it is easily available on the YouTube application.

Moreover

, you are just one fingertip away to listen to a song of your choice.

To conclude

, whether it is in the form of local or international, art can help a human being to improve health and fight against tough situations by relaxing your brain muscles.

Also

, with the evolution of digital devices, one can easily reach any kind of

music

Submitted by prudhvi.pinninti18 on Mon Feb 13 2023

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

254 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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