Buying things on the Internet, such as books, air ticketsand groceries, is becoming more and more popular. Do the advantages of shopping in this way outweigh the disadvantages?

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Nowadays online shopping become more popular the public purchases books, flight tickets, clothes and many other things. In my opinion, I believe the benefits outweigh the disadvantages. In

this

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essay, I am going to discuss the benefits and drawbacks and draw my personal conclusion. In terms of advantages side, buying goods on the Internet is much faster and easier than the ordinary way.

Firstly

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, you do not have to own or spend on transport to go to the malls or stores you can only use your device to shop.

Moreover

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, that will reduce the traffic jams in the cities.

Secondly

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, there will be a new economy from the online stores and that will make up new jobs and trade for the members of society.

Finally

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, it is extremely simple to compare between the different shops and offers. There is no doubt that there are some disadvantages to online shopping. A high percentage risk of manipulation, security payment issues, and online rob. As an example, the clients may order a T-shirt and get another colour or style.

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, the malls and stores will face challenges from e-commerce.

For example

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, reduced sales amount and many of them broke and ended their trade.

Also

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, the duration of the ship the orders might take a long period to arrive for customers.

Finally

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, buying on the Internet stimulates people to spend more purchasing unnecessary things. In conclusion, online shopping become more popular recently. I believe e-commercials have advantages for individuals and more than drawbacks.

Yousef Thu Mar 13 2025

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task achievement

The introduction would benefit from a more explicit thesis statement that clearly outlines your position and the main points you will discuss.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure you provide clear transitions between points and paragraphs to enhance the flow of the essay. For example, use linking words like 'furthermore' or 'however.'

task achievement

Try to give more specific examples to support your claims. For instance, when mentioning security issues, you can elaborate on how they affect consumers and give specific examples.

coherence and cohesion

In your conclusion, rephrase your main points to reinforce your argument. A more thorough summary of your main ideas would strengthen your closing remarks.

task achievement

The essay clearly presents a balanced view of the topic by discussing both advantages and disadvantages of online shopping, which is commendable.

task achievement

You effectively identified a few relevant advantages and disadvantages of online shopping, showing that you understand the topic well.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

250 words

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Buying things on the Internet, such as books, air ticketsand groceries, is becoming more and more popular. Do the advantages of shopping in this way outweigh the disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Today our communications ,medical and transport systems all depend on computer technology . Our reliance on computer technology inthese has created a dengerous situation

In many cities, many people are living in large apartment blocks. Does this accommodation have more advantages or disadvantages?

Today level of stress at the work place are increasing tremendously. What are the causes? what can the problem create?

*The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives.* *To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement*

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement