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Band 4

The following show the main source of rubbish collected during a public clean-up day in one city and the main sources of rubbish collected from three locations within that city.

#show #source #rubbish #city #sources #three #locations
Cleaning up
rubbish
 in
one
 city shows many kinds of
rubbish
. As we can see in the pie chart, there are 6 different types of
rubbish
.
The
Correct article usage
Cigarette
show examples
cigarette
butts
 dominate with a
percentage
40
Change preposition
of 40
show examples
%. Not only are the
cigarette
butts
,
Add the word(s)
but,
show examples
the plastic bottles
also
 dominate the chart right after the
cigarette
butts
 of course. Its
percentage
 is 21%, almost
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half of the
cigarette
butts
.
Furthermore
,
aluminum
Change the spelling
aluminium
show examples
 cans got 12% and followed by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
glass with a
percentage
10
Change preposition
of 10
show examples
%. Other than that, drinking straws got the lowest
percentage
 with only 8%. Less than any other
collected-
Correct your spelling
collected rubbish
show examples
rubbish
.
Lastly
, other types of
rubbish
 that cannot be mentioned
one
 by
one
 –and are classified as “other” got 9%.
Moreover
, we
also
 can notice the table. That picture summarizes the
weight
 (in
kilogram
) of
collected-
Correct your spelling
collected rubbish
show examples
rubbish
 during a public clean-up day in
one
 city. In Arden Park, the total
weight
 of the top three items is 66
kilogram
Fix the agreement mistake
kilograms
show examples
. That 66
kilogram
Change to a plural noun
kilograms
show examples
include
Correct subject-verb agreement
includes
show examples
 glass (33
kg
),
aluminum
Change the spelling
aluminium
show examples
 cans (24
kg
),
as well as
cigarette
butts
 (9). Another fantastic total
weight
 is in Diego Beach,
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 is up to 803
kilogram
Change to a plural noun
kilograms
show examples
. Most in any other location. It contains tyres (563
kg
),
cigarette
butts
 (161
kg
), and plastic bottles (69
kg
). The
last
, in Memorial Park,
cigarette
butts
 have 214
kilogram
Change to a plural noun
kilograms
show examples
, plastic bottles 108
kilogram
Change to a plural noun
kilograms
show examples
, and
aluminum
Change the spelling
aluminium
show examples
 cans 66
kilogram
Change to a plural noun
kilograms
show examples
. The total
weight
 of those three items is 378. All in all,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
rubbish
 should
collected
Change the verb form
be collected
show examples
 regularly by some people in any city around the world.
Moreover
, the
percentage
 of some college students was 4.2, almost twofold bigger than undergraduate degrees, 2.5%.
However
, the college degree graduates’ wages were higher than some college people, $1,100 and $675 per week respectively.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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