Some people use social media to keep in touch with Other people and news events. Do you think advantages of this technology outweigh the disadvantages.
There is no denying the fact that the main purpose of social media is debatable. Some communities argue that social
network
may help in keeping societies in contact and update them with the new Fix the agreement mistake
networks
informations
. In the forthcoming paragraphs, I am going to examine Change the wording
information
pieces of information
this
question from both points of view and then
explain my opinion.
There are people who argue that the benefits of Correct article usage
the internet
internet
community considerably outweigh it is demerits. The main reason for believing Capitalize word
Internet
this
is that social platform
may increase Fix the agreement mistake
platforms
populations bond
and Fix the agreement mistake
population bonds
makes
them feel more social. Correct subject-verb agreement
make
For instance
, the social webcite
can help immigrants to see their families Correct your spelling
websites
virtualy
even though their relatives live in another part of the world. Correct your spelling
virtually
Therefore
, Using social network
may help Fix the agreement mistake
networks
public
to not feel alone. Indeed, Add an article
the public
this
makes it clear that social platform
has many positives to people's life
.
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
On the other hand
, others believe that the use of social network
may Fix the agreement mistake
networks
cause
more harmful to societies. populations often have Verb problem
be
this
opinion because social
Add an article
the social
platform
may increase Fix the agreement mistake
platforms
distaction
and Correct your spelling
distraction
prevents
people Correct subject-verb agreement
prevent
to perform
their jobs effectively. To illustrate, a prestigious journal article published a study Change preposition
from performing
stated
that 50% of teenagers who use the Wrong verb form
stating
internet
on regular
basis tend to fail in their exams. Correct article usage
a regular
Moreover
, on
Change preposition
in
long
Correct article usage
the long
terms
, networkers Fix the agreement mistake
term
becomes
Change the verb form
become
addictors
to social Correct your spelling
addicted
webcites
. Correct your spelling
websites
Thus
, it becomes apparent that social platform
might cause more harm to the population.
In conclusion, I believe both arguments have their merits. On balance, Fix the agreement mistake
platforms
however
, I feel that the demerits of social network
outweigh the merits. Fix the agreement mistake
networks
This
is because the
negative impact on Change preposition
of the
the
Correct article usage
apply
internet
users which resulted in internet
addiction and neglecting the main job tasks.Submitted by mgumssan on
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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a clear topic related to the main idea. Connect ideas more effectively to improve coherence and cohesion.
Task Achievement
Try to provide more specific examples and evidence to support your points. Make sure your ideas are fully developed and relevant to the topic.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.