SomePeople are believed that children are given too much free time.They feel that this time should be used to do more school work. How do you think children should spent their free time.

#somepeople #children #time #school #work

Nowadays,

due to

the ever-increasing competition, there is a lot of burden being put on children. There are a few people who think that teenagers have a lot of spare

time

and

this

time

should be used by them to complete their academic work.

While

I partially agree with

this

, I believe they should be encouraged to use

this

time

to take part in other extracurricular activities. In

this

essay, I will explain my view with examples.

Firstly

, it is important to note that

although

being superior academically is beneficial to teenagers, they must

also

take care of their physical and mental health.

As a result

, they should pursue their favourite hobby and participate in some sports activities.

For instance

, youths who have a liking for dance should try to develop their dance skills.

In addition

, if they are interested in a sport

such

football

Change the article

a football

show examples

then

their parents should motivate them to play in football competitions.

This

will not only help their physical health but

also

their mental health as they would be doing the things they like.

Secondly

, I believe it is essential for a parent to give their children some or

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

other responsibility from a younger age.

For example

, helping their mothers with the groceries,

arranging

Wrong verb form

arrange

show examples

things in the cupboard,

keeping

Wrong verb form

keep

show examples

the house clean and tidy, and

assisting

Wrong verb form

assist

show examples

the elderly's in any way possible.

This

not only gives a sense of responsibility to them, but it

also

helps them become good human beings. They learn that helping others is a righteous thing to do.

Therefore

, they can set an example for future generations as well. In conclusion,

although

feeling that adolescents should spend their free

time

studying is debatable. In my opinion, they should be allowed to develop their physical skills and hobbies.

Furthermore

, they should

also

be tasked with a few household responsibilities.

Submitted by mohanishmasdekar on Thu Feb 16 2023

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15Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

308 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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SomePeople are believed that children are given too much free time.They feel that this time should be used to do more school work. How do you think children should spent their free time.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people believe The purpose of education should be helping to individual to become useful for society while others believe it should be help individuals to achieve their ambitions. Discuss both sites and give your opinion

In some countries it is thought advisable that children begin formal education at 4 years old while in others they do not have to start school until they are seven or eight. How far do you agree with either of these views?

In some countries the lifestyle of people is changing rapidly, and this affects family relationship. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

It is observed that in many countries not enough students are choosing to study science as a subject. What are the causes? And what will be the effects on society? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.

New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do you think the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?