IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

Government should apply tax on unhealthy food to inspire people to eat healthy food which is beneficial for their health. Do you agree or disagree

#government #tax #food #people #health
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the chart illustrates the
persentage
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percentage
 of three food substance in typical meals where
thay
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they
maybe
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may be
show examples
 unhealthy if they are consumed together.
overall
Linking Words
, as we can see in the
bearkfast
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breakfast
 it is the lowest percentage
in
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of
show examples
 all of them ,
whereas
Linking Words
 dinner
have
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has
show examples
 the highest
consumtion
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consumption
 rates except added sugar .
to begin
Linking Words
, sodium and saturated fat are being consumed the most at dinner where
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
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rate
Use synonyms
 from 43 to 37
percent
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per cent
show examples
while
Linking Words
 they are being the lowest at snacks and
braekfast
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breakfast
 .
additionally
Linking Words
, both of them
reange
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range
 from 26% to 29% at lunch ,which has the middle
consumtion
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consumption
rate
Use synonyms
 between the others.
moreover
Linking Words
,
addedd suger
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added sugar
 has 42
percentage
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
at
Change preposition
of
show examples
 snacks ,which is the only material
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 has
this
Linking Words
 significant
rate
Use synonyms
 at
this
Linking Words
 meal.
furthermore
Linking Words
, as it is included in dinner ,where it
take
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takes
show examples
 23% of it which
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is the second highest
rate
Use synonyms
 after snacks.
however
Linking Words
, it
take
Change the verb form
takes
show examples
 only from 16% to 19% in lunch and
breakfst
Correct your spelling
breakfast
.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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