Many parents believe that children should attend extra classes after school hours while some disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is every
parents
Change noun form
parent's
show examples
dream to see their
children
excel in their academics, and
therefore
some parents resort to having their
children
attend
classes
after
school
hours
.
This
seems to be a solution
especially
Add the comma(s)
,especially
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
those students who are slow
learners
.
Secondly
,
this
could be helpful in helping these
learners
revise their work.
One
Correct your spelling
On
show examples
the other hand
this
could be exhausting to the
children
, and there will be no time for other extracurricular
activities
. In my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
I believe allowing time for extra
classes
after
school
hours
could bring more harm than good.
Firstly
, having extra
classes
after
school
hours
could be beneficial to those students who
not
Add a missing verb
are not
show examples
gifted academically,
such
children
struggle
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
with their
school
work, and
therefore
adding two or three
hours
a day could go a long way in helping address the areas they are struggling with.
In addition
, these extra
classes
could help the
learners
to revise and review the topics taught throughout the day
this
is vital, as they help in retaining the knowledge gained.
For instance
, there are some boarding schools
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
allow
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
learners
to attend
classes
after
school
hours
, and
this
is seen especially in those in secondary schools.
However
, having extra
hours
of
classes
way after
school
could leave the
children
exhausted,
this
is because
children
's concentration levels tend to decline throughout the day,
consequently
increasing their stress levels
causing
Correct word choice
and causing
show examples
anxiety, in the
end
Add the comma(s)
,end
show examples
cause more harm than good.
Secondly
, there will be no time for extracurricular
activities
,
such
as sports or social clubs. These
activities
allows
Change the verb form
allow
show examples
children
to relax their minds, interact with their peers, and
also
help them to be physically fit, social clubs help to cultivate basic skills
such
as communication. Educationists have stated that incorporating creative
activities
help students become better
learners
, and increase their concentration levels,
therefore
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
better
learners
. In conclusion,
while
having extra
classes
after
school
hours
could be beneficial, caution should be taken not to neglect
other facet
Change the wording
another facet
other facets
show examples
of education which are essential for the
overall
development of
children
.
Submitted by wanjalahope14 on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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