Many parents believe that children should attend extra classes after school hours while some disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is every
parents
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parent's
show examples
dream to see their
children
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excel in their academics, and
therefore
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some parents resort to having their
children
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attend
classes
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after
school
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hours
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.
This
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seems to be a solution
especially
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,especially
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
those students who are slow
learners
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.
Secondly
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,
this
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could be helpful in helping these
learners
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revise their work.
One
Correct your spelling
On
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the other hand
this
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could be exhausting to the
children
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, and there will be no time for other extracurricular
activities
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. In my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
I believe allowing time for extra
classes
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after
school
Use synonyms
hours
Use synonyms
could bring more harm than good.
Firstly
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, having extra
classes
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after
school
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hours
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could be beneficial to those students who
not
Add a missing verb
are not
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gifted academically,
such
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children
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struggle
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
with their
school
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work, and
therefore
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adding two or three
hours
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a day could go a long way in helping address the areas they are struggling with.
In addition
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, these extra
classes
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could help the
learners
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to revise and review the topics taught throughout the day
this
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is vital, as they help in retaining the knowledge gained.
For instance
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, there are some boarding schools
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
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allow
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
learners
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to attend
classes
Use synonyms
after
school
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hours
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, and
this
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is seen especially in those in secondary schools.
However
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, having extra
hours
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of
classes
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way after
school
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could leave the
children
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exhausted,
this
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is because
children
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's concentration levels tend to decline throughout the day,
consequently
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increasing their stress levels
causing
Correct word choice
and causing
show examples
anxiety, in the
end
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,end
show examples
cause more harm than good.
Secondly
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, there will be no time for extracurricular
activities
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,
such
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as sports or social clubs. These
activities
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allows
Change the verb form
allow
show examples
children
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to relax their minds, interact with their peers, and
also
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help them to be physically fit, social clubs help to cultivate basic skills
such
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as communication. Educationists have stated that incorporating creative
activities
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help students become better
learners
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, and increase their concentration levels,
therefore
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become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
better
learners
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. In conclusion,
while
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having extra
classes
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after
school
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hours
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could be beneficial, caution should be taken not to neglect
other facet
Change the wording
another facet
other facets
show examples
of education which are essential for the
overall
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development of
children
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.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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