Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

#children #hours #smartphones #case #development

In today's society , it is ubiquitous to notice that youngsters spend hours on their

smartphones

on a daily

basic

Replace the word

basis

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This

essay will explore the cause of

this

issue and provide my opinion that it is a merit change in the community .

To begin

with , it is obvious that nowadays

children

are living in

the

Correct article usage

show examples

era in which

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

artificial

intelligent

Replace the word

intelligence

show examples

and

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

advanced technology are constantly developing , so it is common that

smartphones

has

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have

show examples

become

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

essential device for people of all ages , especially young

children

This

is because not only smartphone is really convenient for people to use but it

also

has many powerful platforms that can enable

Correct pronoun usage

them to

show examples

fulfill

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fulfil

show examples

their assignments and relax

everyday

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every day

show examples

.Needless to say ,

smartphones

are considered

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apply

show examples

a must-have device for

children

who are very curious and have a passion to explore many new apps on

phones

, and they

spending

Wrong verb form

spend

show examples

hours

immerged

Correct your spelling

immersed

show examples

themselves

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

in their

smartphones

as a result

This

is an important development because thanks to

this

, when

children

spending

Wrong verb form

spend

show examples

hours on their mobile

phones

, they can have the opportunities to develop their critical thinking through many

education

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educational

show examples

apps on

smartphones

. Not only that , youngsters can have more

chance

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chances

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to broaden their horizons by attending many online classes or

get

Wrong verb form

getting

show examples

useful materials on many websites through state-of-the-art

phones

Last

but not least , juveniles can meet their relatives and friends through many virtual meetings

with

Change preposition

without

show examples

having to travel a long distance .

Therefore

, it is beneficial for

children

to allocate their time

Change preposition

show examples

smartphones

. In conclusion , the justification of why

children

spending

Wrong verb form

spend

show examples

their whole time on their

phones

is very obvious and

this

tendency may bring many advantages

Correct word choice

and impact

show examples

impact

Fix the agreement mistake

impacts

show examples

for youngsters in the long run .

Submitted by bobong120906 on Fri Feb 17 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

297 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

smartphones
usage
technology
accessibility
convenience
entertainment
gaming
social media
communication
educational resources
addiction
dependence
negative effects
physical health
mental health

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Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

Fully explain your ideas

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