some people say that it is responsibility of the individual to save money for their own care after they retire. Do you agree or disagree?
In the present world, folks have started planning an early
retirement
. Many nations do not provide any retirement
plans to their citizens despite having a high tax
rate on all commodities. I completely disagree with the argument that it is an individual's own responsibility to have savings to take care of themselves after retirement
.
Firstly
, from the time a person
is born, he has to pay service on everything he purchases. For instance
, if a person
is going out for a meal, he pays tax
on transit and food. This
is just a basic example of how society has to pay the government for its every activity. Even if a person
decides to cook a meal by himself, he has to pay a tax
on the groceries. If everything for the government is being paid by the communities, then
there should be an age limit after which the official agencies start paying society back in the
Correct article usage
apply
term
of a Fix the agreement mistake
terms
retirement
plan.
Secondly
, official agencies take a major chunk of a person
's salary every year. It feels senseless to common people to first have a huge part of their income taken away and then
again have to pay for everything they purchase. For example
, in Canada, almost 40 per cent of income gets deducted as tax
every year, where almost all commodities are provided by private incorporations. Paying large money for their complete life and not getting any breaks is depressing.
Finally
, as I mentioned above, a person
who keeps paying the government his whole life, no matter what financial condition he is in, deserves a break in his life. So, every nation should have a retirement
plan, that would help society to live their last
years peacefully.Submitted by kunwar81145vats on
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task response
Task Achievement: The response provides relevant arguments against the idea that it is an individual's responsibility to save for retirement. However, some points lack development, and the essay does not fully address all aspects of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: The essay has a generally logical structure and presents a clear introduction and conclusion. However, the development of supporting points is somewhat weak, and the use of examples is not fully effective in enhancing clarity and coherence.