IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Many people believe that media coverage of celebrities is having a negative effect on children. To what extent do you agree? You should write at least 254 words.

#minutes #people #media #coverage #celebrities #effect #children
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A huge percentage of the population argues that
media
Use synonyms
 coverage of popular folks has an adverse influence on children. Social
media
Use synonyms
 has a lot of
potential
Change to a plural noun
potentials
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 to create an impact on the young generation. In my opinion, it has a positive effect on the youth. The primary reason is that it helps to inculcate good qualities in kids
such
Linking Words
 as determination, leadership and integrity.
Besides
Linking Words
, children not only look up to famous personalities but
also
Linking Words
 try to be like them.
As a result
Linking Words
, they end up developing similar traits.
For instance
Linking Words
, Dhoni has exceptional leadership qualities and is very calm under stressful situations and his followers try to copy his behaviour and eventually develop those qualities. These days, the young generation has a very sedentary lifestyle and celebrities have influenced them to follow a healthy diet
as well as
Linking Words
 to lead a disciplined life.
In addition
Linking Words
,
achievements
Correct article usage
the achievements
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 of these famous figures are known to all
due to
Linking Words
 the
media
Use synonyms
. Some of them came from very poor families and went on to achieve great things
as a result
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 of their determination. They followed their passion and never gave up.
This
Linking Words
 never
give
Change the verb form
gives
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 up attitude is very essential these days as the youth gets demotivated very easily.
For example
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, famous cricketers like Sachin and Dhoni came from very middle-class families but they worked extremely hard to achieve their goals.
To conclude
Linking Words
,
media
Use synonyms
 if used in a constructive way can help
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society in many ways. Celebrities have a great influence on the young ones and we should use it to our advantage.
Submitted by prudhvi.pinninti18 on

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