Young people who commit crimes should be treated in the same way as adults. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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There is a controversial dispute about whether the punishment for teenage and mature criminals should be identical. From my point of view about life, I partly agree with

this

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debate. To commence with, imposing punishments on adult citizens is necessary because

this

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purpose will form an orderly society.

Therefore

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, the safety of residents will be protected because of the regulations.

However

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, regarding immature wrongdoers, governments should consider these penalties carefully before applying them.

Since

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According to

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many scientific studies, juvenile delinquents have a deficiency in perception, meaning their ability to discriminate between good and wrong manners is not yet shaped.

Consequently

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, they cannot control their behaviours or might not rein in their eutrophic emotions.

Therefore

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, authorities should impose another mild discipline on them.

For example

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, when young people scribble on the wall at the supermarket, police officers could take them to serve the community

instead

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of jailing them.

On the other hand

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, offenders related to serious crimes should be punished regardless of their age. Youthful violators are increasing for many reasons, like playing violent video games,

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then

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apply

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they can generate savage crimes,

such

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as killing massive numbers of people.

Therefore

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, governments should apply the severest punishment, called the death penalty, to dangerous murderers, whether they are under 18 years old. It means that the existence of cruel delinquents will be discarded from society.

Hence

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, the safety of the citizens will be maintained.

Moreover

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this

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strict discipline can help governments inhibit juvenile lawbreakers from savagely and illegally misbehaving. To summarize everything stated, punishing immature violators and adults by using similar regulations based on their extent of guilt.

Submitted by Mads on Tue Feb 21 2023

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task response

Ensure that the opinion on the topic is clearly stated and maintained throughout the essay. Provide balanced arguments for both agreements and disagreements.

coherence and cohesion

Organize the essay into clear paragraphs with a well-defined introduction and conclusion. Use transition words to improve the coherence and cohesion of ideas.

lexical resource

Expand the variety of vocabulary used to express ideas and to connect them logically. Avoid repetition and strive for a more complex and formal language style.

grammatical range

Work on the accurate use of complex grammatical structures. Ensure the use of a variety of sentence structures to convey ideas.

11
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

264 words

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It is too expensive to look after and repair old building .Tho money should spend on building new modern buildings instead .To what extent do you agree or disagree.

The most important function of music is that it helps people reduce stress. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Some people think that everyone has the right to have access to university education, and that governments should make it free for all students no matter what financial background they have. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion.