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Band 8

The bar chart below show the number of hours each teacher spent teaching in different school in four country in 2001.

The bar chart below show the number of hours each teacher spent teaching in different school in four country in 2001.
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The following bar chart illustrates the number of
hours
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 each teacher spend teaching around the world in 2001. It can clearly be seen that as older the students get the more
hours
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 the teachers teach. In primary, the hour teacher is around 600 for Japan , Spain and Iceland .
However
Linking Words
 , in the USA it grew by 150
hours
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 more than the other three . Lower Secondary was not stable for Japan it was just above 600 when it was over 700 for Spain . But the USA again had the most
hours
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 reaching 1000
hours
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 taught by a teacher . For the Upper ,Secondary it is always an increase as the country becomes more developed . Japan only had 700
hours
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 which is the lowest for Upper Secondary, USA spiked to just below 1100
hours
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 taught by a tutor . But , Spain and Iceland actually almost have the same time for the older group around 900.

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Linking words: Add more linking words.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words hours with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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