“Fatherhood ought to be emphasised as much as motherhood. The idea that women are solely responsible for deciding whether or not to have babies leads on to the idea that they are also responsible for bringing the children up.” To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In recent years, being a mother stood up one step forward than being a
father
. Being a parent in
this
century might look
little
Correct article usage
a little
show examples
selfish to you. What about
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
your significant other? Did you ask your partner if he/she want to become a parent before getting pregnant or after you found out you are going to have a
baby
? In
this
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
I will argue the statement
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
both ways and
examples
Change preposition
with examples
show examples
. On one hand, I have seen a lot of divorce scenes in
this
my mortal life as a family law attorney. Some cases
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
really extraordinary and I would like to share one of them with you. I had a
client
who got pregnant with a man who is already married. The man in the story wanted an affair but not
serious
Add an article
a serious
show examples
relationship. My
client
wanted
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a
Add a missing verb
be a
show examples
mother so she can take
advantages
Fix the agreement mistake
advantage
show examples
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
baby’s
Correct article usage
the baby’s
show examples
father
. In the court, we declared that
father
Correct article usage
the father
show examples
has to
involved
Add a missing verb
be involved
show examples
with
baby’s
Correct article usage
the baby’s
show examples
stipends and special days.
Also
, my
client
asked if she can get some money for herself too. But Supreme Court
said
Add the punctuation
,said
show examples
“Your(
Client
) intention was not innocent so the biological
father
of the
baby
does not have to be involved
anything
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in anything
show examples
to
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apply
show examples
with her.” In
this
case, we saw that we cannot force anyone to do stuff.
On the other hand
, in Islam even though many people
does
Change the verb form
do
show examples
not know your male partner can not force you to have a
baby
. It is forbidden to force
female
Correct article usage
a female
show examples
partner
Fix the agreement mistake
partners
show examples
.
Its
Replace the word
It's
It is
show examples
coming directly from the Almighty.
Hence
, if he wants to have a
baby
and she gives birth, he has to take care of the
baby
and the wife.
For
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
if the wife asks for
housekeeper
Add an article
a housekeeper
the housekeeper
show examples
and a
baby sitter
Correct your spelling
babysitter
show examples
for the
baby
the husband has to provide. As a Muslim and as
woman
Correct article usage
a woman
show examples
,
this
is the most beautiful part of the religion. In conclusion, we can not urge anyone to do anything especially when it comes to
have
Change the verb form
having
show examples
a
baby
. I think women have to right in their hands to become
a parents
Correct the article-noun agreement
parents
a parent
show examples
and raise them but only if their intention is good.
Submitted by sezginmelda on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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