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Writing Samples
Band 6

Do you think that kids under 14 should be allowed to participate in boxing competitions?

#kids #competitions
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The question of whether
children
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 under 14 should be allowed to participate in boxing competitions is a contentious issue. On one hand, boxing is a
sport
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 that requires physical strength, discipline, and mental toughness, which can be beneficial for
children
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.
On the other hand
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, there are serious health
risks
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 associated with the
sport
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, particularly for young, developing brains. Boxing is a high-impact
sport
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 that involves repeated blows to the head. These blows can cause concussions, which can have long-term effects on brain function. In
children
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, whose brains are still developing, the risk of permanent damage is particularly concerning.
Additionally
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, boxing can cause other serious injuries,
such
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 as broken bones and internal bleeding.
While
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 some argue that boxing can teach
children
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 valuable lessons about discipline, perseverance, and sportsmanship, there are other sports that can provide the same benefits without the same
risks
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.
For example
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, martial arts
such
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 as judo or karate can teach
self-defense
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self-defence
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 skills and promote physical fitness, without the same risk of brain injury. Ultimately, the decision to allow
children
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 under 14 to participate in boxing competitions should be made with great care. It is important to consider the potential
risks
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 and benefits,
as well as
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 the individual child's physical and mental health. It may be possible to mitigate some of the
risks
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 of boxing,
such
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 as by requiring protective headgear and closely monitoring athletes for signs of injury. In conclusion,
while
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 boxing can be a rewarding and challenging
sport
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, the
risks
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 associated with it are significant, particularly for young
children
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. Parents, coaches, and organizers should carefully consider the potential
risks
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 and benefits before allowing
children
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 to participate in boxing competitions
,
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apply
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 and should take steps to minimize the
risks
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 of injury. Ultimately, the safety and well-being of
children
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 should be the top priority in any decision regarding their participation in sports.
Submitted by Patlada.chum on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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