Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Happiness
is
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
main aspect and goal of anyone’s
life
, living just a way of
life
shouldn’t be the lifestyle of any human being. Everyone should be feeling
happiness
Replace the word
happy
show examples
the
Change preposition
with the
show examples
way of lifestyle they choose over
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
other
things
.
Then
only we will be able to justify
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
our
life
. In order to achieve
this
few argue that having more money would lead to a happy
life
compare
Change the form of the verb
compared
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to other
things
.
Contrasting
Wrong verb form
Contrast
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, to
this
others
Add the comma(s)
,others
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believe it’s not only the money which makes
people
happy there are other
things
that could bring
joyful
Replace the word
joy
show examples
in
Change preposition
to
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one’s
life
like it could be a living creature or
non-living
Correct article usage
a non-living
show examples
creature or it could
also
be
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
beautiful nature.
Firstly
, being
rich
Add an article
a rich
the rich
show examples
person has a lot
off
Replace the word
of
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authority, dominance
on
Change preposition
over
show examples
anything like influence over
the
Correct article usage
apply
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things
,
freedom
Correct word choice
and freedom
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of purchase without having any hesitation
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
spending amount for
things
.
For
instance
Add a comma
,instance
show examples
big shot
Add a hyphen
big-shot
show examples
people
does
Change the verb form
do
show examples
not think over twice
on
Change preposition
about
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getting anything,
instead
if they feel so to purchase it, they get it. In return makes them
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
feel
happiness
Add an article
the happiness
show examples
of getting whatever they wish for it.
Secondly
, we
also
need to consider getting whatever we wish for does not make
happiness
permanent in one’s
life
, it is just
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
temporary
happiness
for a shorter period of
time
. Others find satisfaction in different ways by doing small
things
or activities like
donation
Replace the word
donating
show examples
, spending
time
with loved one, engaging
time
with
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite
show examples
activities like music, sports etc and
also
spending
time
with nature bring
happiness
in
Change preposition
to
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people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
face. For
an a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
instance spending
time
with nature or sitting next to our
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite
show examples
person and even doing small
things
which
brings
Correct subject-verb agreement
bring
show examples
togetherness between them
also
makes a
person
Change noun form
person's
show examples
life
cheerful. These
people
believe that apart from having richness they are other
things
which can’t be procured by just having money.
To conclude
, the intention of
anyone
Change noun form
anyone's
show examples
life
is to bring
meaningful
Replace the word
meaning
show examples
for the
life
by having
happiness
that can be obtained either by having richness or by experiencing
happiness
with other
things
.
Submitted by nlchiranth11 on

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Financial security
  • Basic needs
  • Comfort
  • Luxury
  • Freedom
  • Altruistic
  • Philanthropy
  • Nurturing relationships
  • Fulfillment
  • Sense of accomplishment
  • Physical well-being
  • Spiritual beliefs
  • Community involvement
  • Gratitude
  • Mindfulness
  • Simple pleasures
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