The government should pay to the parents of very young children, so that one of them can stay at home and look after their children. What do you think are the pros and cons of this policy? Justify your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In the modern days of society, it has become a trend to maintain the financial standard &
beat
inflation to a larger extent. It is Correct word choice
and beat
also
believed that to fight the price rise, Both mother & father
should be working. In Correct word choice
and father
this
scenario care of children will be affected. Consequently
, one scheme has been proposed and according to
that, the government should give monetary benefit to the parents of very young offspring so that one of them can take better care of them by staying at home. Nevertheless
, the drafted policy certainly will make an impact in positive & negative
ways.
To commence with, the parents can take care of their children in a much better way provided they get financial support from the government in order to maintain their lifestyle & Correct word choice
and negative
basic
needs Correct word choice
and basic
of
Change preposition
apply
them
.Correct pronoun usage
apply
In addition
to that, they can improve their work-life balance which can be constructive in shaping their future. For instance
, recently one article has been published in TOI (Times of India) in the Lifestyle edition. According to
that, if a child is getting nurtured under the supervision of the parents, will tend to become more responsible & smarter to face challenges in future.
On the contrary
, there are some adverse effects of mentioned
law which clearly demonstrates that spending on like schemes will lead to a financial burden which results in increased taxes by the Authority. Correct article usage
the mentioned
Moreover
, there are many cases where an individual is found to misuse the given backing by lawmakers. As far as my personal experience is concerned I would rather not take any benefit to avoid unwanted tax liability.
In conclusion, there are both notions which are there
in support & Correct pronoun usage
apply
against
the said rule. Correct word choice
and against
Although
, we should be more sensible when it comes to nurturing our children & Correct word choice
However
Correct word choice
and maintain
maintain
a work-life balance. it is quite obvious that everyone wants their loved ones raised with a good foundation & Wrong verb form
maintaining
become
independent.Correct word choice
and become
Submitted by Varun Papneja on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task response
Task Response: The essay shows some relevant points but needs to provide more specific examples to support the main ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: The essay has a coherent structure and the introduction and conclusion are present. However, the main points need better supporting details and connections between ideas.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!