IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

the charts below show temperature and rainfall in Equatorial climate and Mediterranean climate.

#show #temperature #rainfall #climate #mediterranean
The charts compare the
amount
 of
temperature
 and
rainfall
 in the Equatorial
climate
 and
Mediterranean
climate
 , which is measured in
degree
Fix the agreement mistake
degrees
show examples
Celsius
 and
mile
Correct article usage
a mile
show examples
metre
Fix the agreement mistake
metres
show examples
. In general , the Equatorial
climate
 accounted
a
Change preposition
for a
show examples
significant
amount
 of
rainfall
 in all the months and
as a result
 ,
temperature
Add an article
the temperature
show examples
 was very low .
Whereas
 , for the
Mediterranean
climate
 it was the opposite. To be specific , January , November and December
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 the months that accounted for
most
Add an article
the most
show examples
amount
 of
rainfall
 in
Equatorial
Correct article usage
the Equatorial
show examples
climate
 , it was 270cu
mm
 in January , 250cu
mm
 (November) and 260cu
mm
 in December ; which was the highest
rainfall
 reported for Equatorial
climate
. Interestingly ,the same trend can be seen for
Mediterranean
Correct article usage
the Mediterranean
show examples
climate
 ;
however
 the
amount
 of
rainfall
 for those months
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 low , which constituted 170
cu
mm
 , 99cu
mm
 ,
150cu
Correct word choice
and 150cu
show examples
mm
 . As consequence , the
temperature
 in
Equatorial
Correct article usage
the Equatorial
show examples
climate
 was stable , which was around 25
degrees
Celsius
through out
Correct your spelling
throughout
show examples
 the year.
While
 for
Mediterranean
Correct article usage
the Mediterranean
show examples
climate
 , it was approximately 150
degrees
Celsius
 in January but after February the
temperature
 increased dramatically and reached a peak of 300
degrees
Celsius
 in August
then
 it decreased to 150
degrees
Celsius
 in December.
Submitted by varshajose345 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 78%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words amount, temperature, rainfall, climate, mediterranean, celsius, cu, mm, degrees with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 4 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: