Ownership of mobile phones has risen dramatically in recent years despite the potentially harmful effects they may have on our health and on society. Government should introduce measures to restrict ownership to those who need them for their work. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#ownership #phones #years #effects #health #society #government #measures #work

Recently, a couple of years ago ownership of smartphones has significantly increased despite the danger it can cause to individuals and on majority.

Therefore

people discuss whether the government should ban and limit telephone usage.

However

, in my point of

view

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,view

show examples

adults are totally free to utilize their personal gadgets,

whereas

for the new

generation

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,generation

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it is prohibited

due to

age-restricted information they can face. To start with, a smartphone is a big distraction to human beings if used only for entertainment. People are ready to scroll through social news and watch shows they enjoy, forgetting about their work.

Thus

this

will lead to being less productive, and misguide a person's success in whatever he or she wants to lead.

For instance

, I was always distracted from my education

as a result

of a huge amount of social media consumption,

afterwards

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,afterwards

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I started to utilize my phone correctly, by reading books, keeping a daily journal and learning through online courses. The opportunity a mobile is providing is astonishing,

hence

if it is used correctly an individual might get marvellous at their work.

Nonetheless

, the problem with banning telephones for kids and teenagers is quite contrasting from adults. Social media has extremely wide information consumption.

Consequently

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,Consequently

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kids might face some restricted data from there. An adult understands what is he or she watching, notwithstanding a teenager can't differentiate the material they see. A huge amount of dopamine is released when a kid watches a restricted video material, which really damages the psychology of youth. In conclusion, I believe that mobile phones shouldn’t be banned for adults,

however

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,however

show examples

they might do it for kids

due to

an argument I mentioned above or at least put some restrictions on the use of social publishings.

Submitted by lil.abdulla on Sat Feb 25 2023

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

291 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Fully explain your ideas

The proportion of older people is increasing, what problems will this cause and what solutions can be suggested?

Some people think that video games are advantageous, while others believe video games are harmful to the people who play them. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion.

Question: Traffic congestion in many cities in the world makes it difficult for people to get in and out of cities, and to move around inside them. Why do you think this is happening? What could be done to solve these problems?