Some people believe that a person's culture is defined by their country of origin, while others believe that has only a minor influence. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

#people #person #culture #country #origin #influence

There are various factors that affect how

people

live throughout their

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

While

some

people

believe that individuals'

cultures

are primarily influenced by a country of origin, others believe that they have a minor effect on their beliefs and acts. I generally agree with the former view for the following reasons. On one hand, it is an undeniable fact that native

cultures

have a direct impact on individual thoughts and acts as they

are

Wrong verb form

have been

show examples

embedded deeply with them since their childhood.

For example

, many Japanese

people

tend to consume more rice and fish on

daily

Correct article usage

a daily

show examples

basis because of the huge influence of its tradition.

In addition

, diligent attitudes can be seen among many Japanese students and workers as they are raised in a country where

people

put more emphasis on hard work in every aspect of

life

In other words

, deeply adapting to the unique lifestyle of the native country makes it more difficult for them to alter their habits.

On the other hand

, in spite of the incredible impacts of the traditional culture on individuals, the growing trend of globalization reduces its significance. Indeed,

people

living today gain more interaction with different

cultures

thanks to the rapid advance of technology and transportation.

As a result

, various ideas and materials

such

as food, music and clothing are frequently imported from foreign nations.

This

allows different styles of living to be provided to facilitate their everyday

life

Therefore

, the acts and beliefs of individuals are not necessarily tied to their original countries as they gain more diverse cultural experiences. In conclusion, the original culture has had a definite and continuous effect on the individual lifestyle throughout their

life

However

, the current flow of international

cultures

makes their lives more diverse.

Submitted by mizuho_kondo117 on Sun Feb 26 2023

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task response

Ensure that each paragraph clearly addresses the assigned task and presents a comprehensive discussion of both views. Provide more detailed examples and explanations to support the ideas.

coherence and cohesion

Maintain a clear and logical structure throughout the essay. Use transition words to connect ideas and ensure the introduction and conclusion effectively frame the discussion.

lexical resource

Expand the range of vocabulary to include more varied and sophisticated language. Use synonyms for repeated words and phrases to enhance lexical diversity.

grammatical range

Demonstrate a wide range of grammatical structures, including complex sentences and a mix of simple, compound, and complex sentences. Take care to avoid repetitive grammatical patterns.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

289 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that a person's culture is defined by their country of origin, while others believe that has only a minor influence. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

In the past when students did a university degree they tended to study in their own country. Nowadays they have morw opportunity to study abroad. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

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Obesity is a serious problem in many countries, especially in reach countries. Discuss ways to solve the problem . Provide specific reason and examples to support your answer.

Convenience foods will become increasingly prevalent and eventually replace traditional foods and traditional methods of food preparation. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?