IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some people say government should give health care the first priorities, some others believe education is more important priorities to spend the taxpayers' money. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #government #health #care #first #priorities #education #taxpayers #money
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There is no denying the fact that the main impact of investing in
health
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 is debatable.
While
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 it is a commonly held belief that investing in
education
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 may have several advantages.
However
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, others believe that authorities must invest more in
health
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.
This
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 essay will shed light upon both arguments and will show my own opinion. There are
people
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 who argue that the benefits of investing in
education
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 considerably outweigh its disadvantages. The main reason for believing
this
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 is that spending money on
education
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 will help in the development of the
country
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.
For instance
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, when the government focuses on children's
education
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, the resulting generation will work hard in building the
country
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 and work in various areas
such
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 as engineering and technology. As
education
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 is the main cause of development in any nation. Indeed,
this
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 makes it clear that
education
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 can help the
country
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 to advance.
On the other hand
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, others argued that investing money in
health
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 care must become
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country's
Correct article usage
the country's
show examples
 number one aim. The population often have
this
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 opinion because having high-quality treatment is the right of the person.
For example
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, if
people
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 didn't find a sufficient cure in their
country
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, they might suffer. To illustrate, the
country
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 requires individuals to serve and help in the advancement
as well as
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 we need to increase the longevity of the elderly as they are the most experienced
people
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.
Thus
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, it becomes apparent that investing in
health
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 may have several advantages for
people
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. In conclusion, both arguments have their merits. On balance,
however
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, I strongly believe that the authority should invest in
health
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 services.
This
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 is because
person's
Correct article usage
a person's
show examples
 right to have the treatment available in his
country
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,
as well as
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 the
country
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 required old
people
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 to be alive to use their experience in different aspects.
Submitted by mgumssan on

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Universal healthcare
  • Preventative measures
  • Productivity
  • Innovation
  • Economic prosperity
  • Alleviate
  • Resource allocation
  • Public-private partnerships
  • Informed electorate
  • Fiscal responsibility
  • Primary education
  • Higher education
  • Life expectancy
  • Civic engagement
  • Sustainable development
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