IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph shows the transport modes in European city between 1960 and 2000

The graph shows the transport modes in European city between 1960 and 2000
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The provided bar chart illustrates the proportion of
the
Correct article usage
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transportation systems between the
year
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
apply
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1960 and 2000 in a European country.
Overall
Linking Words
, there was some major fluctuation in transport mode
of
Change preposition
over
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 three different years. The
most
Correct quantifier usage
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transportation methods used by people are
cars
Use synonyms
 and
by
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foot.
According to
Linking Words
 the data, in 1960
cars
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 are the least vehicles operated by people just about 6%,
while
Linking Words
bywalking
Correct your spelling
walking
by walking
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 the most people
like
Wrong verb form
liked
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 and the number of
this
Linking Words
 method reached approximately 34%.
Following
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, in 1980 the transportation system by bus was the highest quantity roughly 26%. Meanwhile, by foot was the lowest amount in that
year
Use synonyms
 it
just
Add a missing verb
was just
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 below 20%.
Finally
Linking Words
, in the new era in
2000
Add a comma
,2000
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 the number of
cars
Use synonyms
have
Change the verb form
has
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 been increased significantly from the
year
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
apply
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1980 and reached over 35%.
This
Linking Words
 was a huge amount than all transport methods and all over the years. On the other side,
the
Correct article usage
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bike was
the
Correct article usage
a
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 small quantity in that
year
Use synonyms
, and the number of
this
Linking Words
 was just under 10%.
This
Linking Words
 is the same amount as
cars
Use synonyms
 in 1960.

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words year, cars with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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