Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays,
children
Use synonyms
and teenagers devote hours to using their phones each day.
This
Linking Words
, in my opinion, results from social media’s exceptional ability to keep users’ attention. It should be viewed as a negative development because it can make
children
Use synonyms
’s mental health receive bad influences. In
this
Linking Words
internet era, social media are extremely good at providing people with
content
Use synonyms
that holds their attention. They track user behaviours like search history and video types watched most, and analyze these data by the methods of machine learning so that they can produce more personalized
content
Use synonyms
for users, which can make users stick with the smartphones. Since
children
Use synonyms
tend to lack self-control, they could spend all their
time
Use synonyms
on “interesting”
content
Use synonyms
and
consequently
Linking Words
waste most of their precious
time
Use synonyms
that should be used to pursue their dreams. Unfortunately, hours of phone
time
Use synonyms
every day can affect harmfully
children
Use synonyms
’s mental development.
For example
Linking Words
, short videos in TikTok, which are thoroughly selected to attract adolescents, are filled with others’ perfect lives. Many kids feel frustrated after watching these videos and probably strive to keep up with each other.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
can keep
children
Use synonyms
from concentrating on the things that really matter,
such
Linking Words
as learning, sports and accompanying families. Imagine that people don’t communicate with each other and are immersed in their own virtual world,
while
Linking Words
the real world becomes unreal, I think no one wants to see
this
Linking Words
in the future. In conclusion, some
children
Use synonyms
spend a large amount of
time
Use synonyms
on their phones every day because social media constantly presents them with
content
Use synonyms
designed to keep their attention. Sadly,
this
Linking Words
can cause adverse influences on their mental health.
Submitted by 474827656 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • smartphones
  • usage
  • technology
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • entertainment
  • gaming
  • social media
  • communication
  • educational resources
  • addiction
  • dependence
  • negative effects
  • physical health
  • mental health
What to do next:
Look at other essays: