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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Once children start school, teachers have more influence than parents on their intellectual and social development. Do you agree or disagree?

#children #school #teachers #influence #parents #development
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In
this
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 contemporary epoch,Once
pupils
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 begin tutor,mentors should have more influence rather than guardians on their intellectual and social development.I agree with
this
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 mentioned phenomenon.
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However
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,However
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 both
view
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views
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 will be discussed in an upcoming paragraph with a logical conclusion. There is adequate evidence of
this
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 view which are substantial.The first and foremost reason is learners spend more
time
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 in institutes with their
teachers
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instead
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 of spending
time
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 with their
parents
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 so in
this
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 case tutors have more influence on
scion's
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scions
scion
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 on their intellectual and social development.Adding more to it when the
children
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 begin learning institute
teachers
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 have to take responsibility for offspring to teach them manners and discipline.,
Additionally
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 they can learn how to do well behave in front of their elders or younger. Probing ahead,
while
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 learning
teachers
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 taught many things to
pupils
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such
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 as they motivate
children
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 to participate in sports,painting or so many indoor and outdoor activities
hence
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 they can enhance their knowledge and skill
as well as
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 live stressless life in
this
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 modern society.
Moreover
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,Mentors are the first mother and fathers who taught learners how to read and write and
also
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 they can encourage them to get an excellent
gdp
Correct your spelling
GDP
 in exams.,
Initially
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 they
also
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 taught them about life and world things.
However
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,
parents
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 are so busy
in
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with
show examples
 their jobs and business
so
Correct word choice
that
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 the guardians
don
Correct your spelling
do
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 not have much
time
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 to spend
time
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 with their
pupils
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 and teach them.At
the
Correct article usage
apply
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present
days
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,days
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 some
parents
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also
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 hired
nanny's
Change the noun form
nannies
nanny
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 to take care of their
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children's
Change noun form
children
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 as they are busy
in
Change preposition
with
show examples
 their jobs so,the schools are only the way where
pupils
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 learn and spend more
time
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 with their mentors. In conclusion,
according to
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 my ,opinion
teachers
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 are the first
parents
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 of the tutors who taught them a lot of things
while
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 there are studying.
However
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,guardians are not a take
such
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 role to teach their
children
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 in real life.
Submitted by sharma1997.rahulthakur on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Structured learning environment
  • Cognitive skills
  • Social interactions
  • Pedagogical techniques
  • Moral values
  • Emotional well-being
  • Complementary roles
  • Academic and social education
  • Individualized attention
  • Life skills training
What to do next:
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