IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

studying art in school improves students' performance in othr subjects,because it is easier for multi-skilled students to learn new things.That's why art should be obligatory in schools. Do you agree or disagree?

#art #school #students #performance #othr #subjects #schools
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is often argued that it is more advantageous for pupils to study
art
Use synonyms
 in school because it helps children to enhance their performance;
therefore
Linking Words
,
art
Use synonyms
 should be compulsory in educational institutions. I completely disagree with
this
Linking Words
 opinion and think that nothing should be obligatory for students. First of all, I believe that crafts are not an essential subject for apprentices to learn, and they should devote time to their favourite subjects and the specific major they want to pursue in the future.
In other words
Linking Words
, spending time studying crafts wouldn'
t
Use synonyms
 have a beneficial effect on their education.
For example
Linking Words
, students who want to study physics in the future wouldn'
t
Use synonyms
 gain something important from crafts;
by contrast
Linking Words
, it distorts their path and confuses them.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
art
Use synonyms
 will not help children develop useful skills. It just motivates people who are really gifted and enjoy it
while
Linking Words
 studying it.
Secondly
Linking Words
, some children don'
t
Use synonyms
 have any talent in
art
Use synonyms
, or they don'
t
Use synonyms
 have any attraction toward it;
hence
Linking Words
, obligating them to study
art
Use synonyms
 like painting, sculpture, or dancing destroys their self-confidence and depresses them.
For instance
Linking Words
, trainees who haven'
t
Use synonyms
 any aptitude may detest school if they fail to do their homework related to
art
Use synonyms
 matters, and it leads to drop off school in the future.
Thus
Linking Words
, not only do they not have any progress in their studies, but
also
Linking Words
 they leave their original subjects.
To conclude
Linking Words
, I strongly believe that
art
Use synonyms
 shouldn'
t
Use synonyms
 be obligatory in schools because it ruins pupils' self-esteem and is not a vital subject;
therefore
Linking Words
, it’s time-consuming.
Submitted by Babak.ghassemi.9 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: