Many people are too scared to leave their home because of a fear of crime. Some people think that more should be done to prevent crime, whereas others feel that nothing can be done. What are your views?

The phenomenon of establishing national immigration police causing a criminal rate rapid drive up these years has aroused wide concern among various circles. Divergent as
people
's views on
this
issue in question may be, I personally believe that the
criminal
Replace the word
crime
show examples
rate would be reduced by several methods. On one hand, many
people
claim that there is nothing we can deal
with
Change preposition
about
show examples
this
dilemma. To illustrate,
due to
the average education level of
people
rising up, massive labour
always
Add a missing verb
is always
show examples
in demand by country.
For instance
, those well-educated
people
do not willing to do some jobs
that
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
basic
Add an article
the basic
a basic
show examples
level of society. So, the government can only hire
workforce
Correct article usage
a workforce
show examples
from foreign countries.
However
, those
people
usually come from some countries that have relatively lower cultural levels and are poorer which is the major reason
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
crime occurs
fequently
Correct your spelling
frequently
. So, many
people
believe that there is nothing
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
show examples
be done to change the
stiuation
Correct your spelling
situation
.
On the other hand
, some
argus
Correct your spelling
argue
show examples
that there are many approaches
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
show examples
fix
this
issue. In my opinion, I personally believe that there are several methods
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
show examples
solve
this
problem. Probably, the most effective one is that enhance the police force.
For example
, the government can increase the
police
Correct quantifier usage
number of police
show examples
unit in each region through hire more
people
in order to organize 24-hour non-stop patrol and support.
Besides
, the lack of labour can be solved by improvement of salaries and
welfares
Fix the agreement mistake
welfare
show examples
of the basic level jobs for the purpose of attaching the locals.
Therefore
, many
people
think that a lot of strategies can be used on
this
problem. Under
this
line of thinking, it seems to me that the reasons cause to the
securty
Correct your spelling
security
issue can fix
by
Change preposition
in
show examples
verious
Correct your spelling
various
ways
such
as military enhancement and
jobs
Change the noun form
job
show examples
treatment improvement. So, I totally agree that many things can be done.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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