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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

In many countries around the world young people decide to leave their parent's home once they finish school. They start living on their own or sharing a house with friends. Is this a positive or a negative development?

#countries #world #people #parent #home #school #house #friends #development
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Nowadays, it has become more popular among youngsters and students to leave their
parents
Change noun form
parent's
parents'
show examples
house
Fix the agreement mistake
houses
show examples
 after graduating. In
this
 essay, I will agree with
this
 approach because it will give a lot of benefits to teenagers.
Firstly
, I will discuss how the process of living separately from a family
affect
Correct subject-verb agreement
affects
show examples
 people’s responsibility, and
secondly
, I will consider how their
decision making
Add a hyphen
decision-making
show examples
 is changing.
To begin
 with, when a young person moves to their own place he or she
begin
Correct subject-verb agreement
begins
show examples
 an adult life full of responsibilities
also
 based on
its
Correct pronoun usage
his
show examples
 actions. All the processes
such
 as paying the rent, doing grocery shopping and organizing a living space depend on one person. In fact, during college teens are getting used to responsibility and it might help them to become more confident in their future life.
For instance
, in some European countries university students prefer an apartment
instead
of
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apply
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dormitories.
Furthermore
, when a youngster begins to live
separate
Change the word
separately
show examples
 from their
parents
 they start to learn how to make decisions in
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 most efficient way in order not
arrive
Fix the infinitive
to arrive
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 with no
money
on
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in
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 their pockets.
This
 is because there is not a budget controlled by
parents
 anymore and when spending
money
 students should be careful and allocate them correctly.
Moreover
,
money
assume
Change the verb form
assumes
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 a new value for them and
this
 might change their attitude towards
money
 and work too.
For example
, a lot of young people when living with their
parents
 do not think about expenses. In conclusion, I think that living separately would be very beneficial for a youngster since they might become more responsible and put a lot more effort
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
 how to use their
money
Submitted by cice on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • independence
  • responsibility
  • life skills
  • budgeting
  • time management
  • social skills
  • conflict resolution
  • financial challenges
  • utilities
  • emotional well-being
  • homesickness
  • support system
  • cultural norms
  • inter-generational conflicts
  • academic performance
What to do next:
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