Topic: Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#topic #people #crime #prison #sentences #alternative

It is believed by some individuals that the most efficient way to decrease illegal actions is to sentence prisoners to longer periods of time in jail.

While

some think that there are better choices for lowering the crime rate. In my opinion , these views are both correct in their own ways and I partially agree with both.

Firstly

, when a lawbreaker is kept behind bars they still can come out and commit another unlawful act because they don't get enough human interaction. So

instead

, we can make them do community service .

This

is better than them being locked up and not doing anything useful for the people.

For instance

, they can clean the highways or even the neighbourhoods .

In other words

, it's better for them to be helping us

instead

of having the chance to go out and do the same thing again afterwards.

On the other hand

, giving a criminal a higher prison sentence could help reduce crime if the government provides the following . Cellmates are mostly people that seek education , so if jails have places like schools where they can go and learn about things would help them a lot .

For instance

, a room where they can learn about chemistry,

this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

enlightens them and after leaving and they can pursue their lives to become a teacher or even a student.

This

could help

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society since it can occasionally be difficult to find teachers . In conclusion , giving longer time in jail time can be efficient if the lawbreakers have a place to get educated and learn from their mistakes . If not , they should work for the citizens .

This

can give them a helping hand

further

in their lifespan and

also

to the

Correct your spelling

humankind

show examples

human kind

Correct your spelling

humankind

show examples

Submitted by alikocak74 on Thu Mar 02 2023

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

302 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic: Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In some countries, young people have little leisure time and are under a lot of presssure to work hard on their studies. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

Education in financial management should be a mandatory component of the school program. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Because of secondary sources such as books, movies, and the internet, people can learn about a foreign culture without visiting a foreign country. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career while others believe that it’s better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your own opinion