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Writing Samples
Band 7

The graph above shows the stock price of four technology companies between 2011 and 2016. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The graph above shows the stock price of four technology companies between 2011 and 2016. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
#stock #price #four #technology #companies #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The line graphs compare
stock
Use synonyms
 values of Facebook, google,
apple
Use synonyms
 and
yahoo
Use synonyms
 over a 5-year period.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
stock
Use synonyms
 rate of
apple
Use synonyms
 significantly fluctuated over the period,
while
Linking Words
 the
stock
Use synonyms
value
Use synonyms
 of
yahoo
Use synonyms
 steadily rose. In 2011, both
yahoo
Use synonyms
 and Facebook had the highest
stock
Use synonyms
 prices, which stood at around 7500.
This
Linking Words
 is closely followed by
apple
Use synonyms
 with a price of 5000,
while
Linking Words
 google had the lowest
value
Use synonyms
 which was around 500. Afterwards, the
stock
Use synonyms
 price of
apple
Use synonyms
 had a significant rise and peaked at 35,000
by
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2012.
Thereafter
Linking Words
, there was a dramatic fall in
Use synonyms
apple
Change noun form
apple's
show examples
 forex
value
Use synonyms
 to 6000 by 2013.
This
Linking Words
 is followed by fluctuation in prices, with market rates settling at 5000 in 2016.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, facebook's market
value
Use synonyms
 consistently increased over the years and it rose to a significant 20000 in 2016.
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 is
in contrast
Linking Words
 to
Use synonyms
stock
Correct article usage
the stock
show examples
 rates of
yahoo
Use synonyms
 which steadily fell to about 2500 in 2016. Google consistently had the least
stock
Use synonyms
 values over the years reviewed and it settled at the same price it had in 2011.
Submitted by murskycharles on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words stock, apple, yahoo, value with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "fall" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 3 times.
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