Music is played in every society and culture in the world today. Some people think that music brings only benefits to individuals and societies. Others, however, think that music can have a negative influence on both. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Nowadays,
music
become part of people’s life because it has been played in every place. Certain individuals argue that music
gives some advantages to people and organizations. While
others are of the opinion that music
can have a disadvantageous influence on both. My essay will discuss both the benefits and drawbacks from my perspective.
On the one hand, music
is a type of tool that can be introduced to people on earth whatever their cultural background is. In addition
, music
which is played with traditional instruments can express their feeling about the meaning of the song
. For example
, the song
‘Manuk Dadali’, created by Sambas Mangundikarta, was played together with
a musical instrument made of bamboo called angklung,
and told a story about a bird as the symbol of Indonesia. Remove the comma
apply
Moreover
, music
brings unity and oneness because it can carry out the role as the national anthem of a country like ‘Indonesia Raya’ which was sung during the independence days of Indonesia every 17 August.
On the other hand
, sometimes music
contains some bad meanings and satires in the lyrics, which are written by one person as a critique of another community or country. For instance
, Green Day wrote American Idiot as the title of his song
and he sang it when the concert was held several years ago and mentioned many bad words to America. It can influence people to lose interest in travelling to America. Second,
music
can have an impact on a person’s mental health. Furthermore
, according to
psychology, sad sounds make our brains think about bad memories we have experienced. As an illustration when we sing a song
whose title is ‘Ghost’, we can feel sadness due to
the absence of a loved one who died a few days ago.
In conclusion, while
music
can influence the listeners through the types of songs they listen to, therefore
, personally speaking, it is beneficial that everyone put music
which can promote unity, cultural awareness, and positive emotions on their list instead
of those that convey negative messages or morals and impact mental.Submitted by riani.the2 on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph addresses a distinct point clearly to enhance understanding.
task achievement
Consider refining your thesis statement to align precisely with the discussed views.
task achievement
Diversify the examples to reflect a variety of perspectives for stronger support.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, providing a cohesive structure.
task achievement
Examples such as 'Manuk Dadali' and 'American Idiot' are effective in supporting your points.
task achievement
The essay effectively discusses both views, maintaining balance throughout.