Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to comsume less sugar.

In
contemporary
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the contemporary
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era, it is
an
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apply
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significant that few
of
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apply
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manufacturing
campanies
Correct your spelling
companies
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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use
Add an article
the use
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of
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apply
show examples
high
level
Fix the agreement mistake
levels
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of
sugar
in their products. it
is
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also increases
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also
increase
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
health issues so,
sugar
products are made more expensive
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
sugar
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
products
for
Change preposition
to
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encourage the consumer to less consumption of
sugar
and save their life
also
. To commence with,
individual's
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individuals
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are just purchasing goods through the
shopes
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shoppes
shops
but they never check the ingredient
uses
Wrong verb form
used
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inside the drinks
moreover
, they
are consume
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are consuming
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
but they never know how much
bad
Replace the word
worse
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for their health
Submitted by sarabjeetkaur079 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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