The diagrams below show the site of a school in 2004 and the plan for changes to the school site in 2024. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#diagrams #show #site #school #plan #changes #summarise #information #features #comparisons

The maps illustrate how an academy site is planned to be developed over 20 years.

Overall

, there will be extensive developments concerning the construction of

buildings

, facilities and roads on the institution site.

Moreover

, the student capacity will be increased significantly. In 2004, there was only one car park to the west of the site where the main entrance was located. There were

also

two educational

buildings

namely

school

buildings

1 and 2, accommodating 600 students, separated by the path connecting the main entrance and the

sports

field to the east. The

school

was surrounded by woodland in the north, south and east. There are plans to increase the number of students learning at the academy by 400 in 2024.

As a result

, a new building called

school

building 3 will be constructed to replace the previous

sports

field, and the two original

school

buildings

are going to be joined together. The old path is going to be shortened connecting these and

school

building 3.

In addition

, a new car park and a new

sports

field are planned to be built on a small sector of the woodland in the east.

Furthermore

, the old road will be extensively paved passing south of

school

building 2 which will connect two car parks.

Finally

, with the old

sports

ground being replaced by the late building, there will be some space for the woodland to grow to the north of the building.

Submitted by mickeymouse_man on Sun Mar 05 2023

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words buildings, school, sports with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

▼

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

239 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The diagrams below show the site of a school in 2004 and the plan for changes to the school site in 2024. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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Small town center shops are running out of business because rural residents tend to go shopping in big cities store. To what extent do the disadvantages of this development outweigh the advantages?

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?