Obesity is a serious problem in many countries, especially in reach countries. Discuss ways to solve the problem . Provide specific reason and examples to support your answer.

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Nowadays, many rich nations are struggling with obesity as a major health challenge. The reasons for the existence of

this

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problem can be tied to the busy nature of citizens that requires folk to eat a lot of junk foods,

as well as

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the lack of awareness of the ripple effect of their actions. To solve these issues, the government should enforce a 4-day working day per week and create enough sensitization on the importance of eating healthy meals.

Firstly

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, a major contributor to

this

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issue is the lack of

time

Use synonyms

available for the population to make

out

Change preposition

apply

show examples

time

Use synonyms

to whip up a meal.

For example

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, recent surveys show that overpopulation in China has increased the traffic situation in the country.

Hence

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people

Use synonyms

tend to get tired when they get home and are unable to prepare a good meal after munching on junk all day. One way to curb

this

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behaviour is the introduction of a reduced

number

Use synonyms

of working days in a week

thus

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giving citizens enough

time

Use synonyms

to stock their fridges with fresh food in readiness for the coming days.

Secondly

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, the level of negligence regarding the consequences of a large

number

Use synonyms

of countrymen on unhealthy living has

also

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led to a high

number

Use synonyms

of obese

people

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For instance

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, ABC

news

Capitalize word

News

show examples

reported that Venezuela has a relatively large

number

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people

Use synonyms

suffering from obesity because there isn't enough education about obesity. A solution to

this

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issue will be the creation of recreational centres and encouraging citizens to engage in exercise by educating them about its benefits.

To sum up

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people

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who have enough

time

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to themselves will live a healthy life.

Moreover

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, the government should conduct some awareness programs about exercises and the beneficial outcomes.

ololaSun Mar 05 2023

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coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are present, but they can be strengthened by providing a clearer thesis statement and summarizing the main points more explicitly.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph directly connects to the main topic and supports the argument presented. Ensure a balanced approach in discussing the ideas and providing examples.

task achievement

The essay effectively responds to the task by discussing reasons for obesity and proposing solutions. However, provide more depth in explaining the ripple effect and the importance of healthy eating. Make sure to address all parts of the prompt.

task achievement

The essay effectively explores the reasons for obesity and provides specific examples to support the proposed solutions.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

287 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

balanced diet
lean proteins
whole grains
recreational facilities
community fitness programs
campaigns
marketing
high-calorie foods
sugary drinks
health education programs
nutritional counseling
medical interventions
food deserts
urban planning
pedestrian-friendly streets

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Obesity is a serious problem in many countries, especially in reach countries. Discuss ways to solve the problem . Provide specific reason and examples to support your answer.

Your opinion

In some countries, owning a homes rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case ? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation ?

Some countries have introduced laws to limit working hours for employees. Why are these laws introduced? Do you think they are a positive or negative development?

Governments in many countries are replacing old buildings such as art galleries and town halls with new ones. Is this a positive or a negative development?

Some people prefer to get up early in the morning and start the day’s work. Others prefer to get up later in the day and work until late at night. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your choice

Some people think that global environment problems should be dealt with internationally. Others, however, believe that they have to be tackled domestically. What is your opinion?