IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #health #future
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In
contemporary
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the contemporary
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 era,
health
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 problems have seen a colossal upsurge. Any discussion as to whether the average standard of people's
health
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 will fall in
future
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 or not
,
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apply
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 is certainly a contentious one.
On the contrary
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, people might have compelling rationales and plausible arguments that the
health
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 standard will
be fall
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fall
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than
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apply
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as compared to today, but I disagree with
this
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 view.
This
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 essay will articulate the reasons to support my stance that
health
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 standards will likely
to
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apply
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be better off in
foreseeable
Correct article usage
the foreseeable
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 time.
To commence
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Commence
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with
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apply
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, there are myriads of arguments to support my position, but the most conspicuous one stems from the increased trend in joining the
health
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 profession. As an illustration, a recent research study carried out by Western Sydney University reveals that more than 40% of
the
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apply
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students are eager to be
a
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apply
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health
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professional
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professionals
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.
Furthermore
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, the training institutes are more likely to have better facilities and procedures in
future
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due to
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 continuous research and development in
medical
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the medical
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 field.
For instance
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, In Australia, the COVID-19 pandemic
was overcame
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was overcome
was overcoming
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due to
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 extremely
up to date
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up-to-date
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health
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 standards and protocols.
Nevertheless
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, there
remains
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remain
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 some problems e.g., corruption in
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health
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the health
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 industry which can certainly be overwhelming, but the potential influence of qualified professional and better institutions will develop the medical field. To recapitulate, after pondering
a great deal of
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a lot of
many
plenty of
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 thoughts and deliberation with myself, I disagree that
the
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apply
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society will face lower
health
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 protocols in
future
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. Advanced
health
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 facilities
due to
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 research and innovation and more professionals in
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health
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the health
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 field can bring the standard to more heights in
future
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 despite of few drawbacks.
Submitted by misbah.kiani on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • 1. Standard of health
  • 2. Average
  • 3. Lower
  • 4. Future
  • 5. Aging population
  • 6. Chronic diseases
  • 7. Sedentary lifestyle
  • 8. Lack of exercise
  • 9. Poor dietary habits
  • 10. Environmental pollution
  • 11. Technological advancements
  • 12. Impact on health
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