Some people think that dangerous sport should be banned while others believe that people should be free to choose. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

There is a debate about whether risky
sports
should be forbidden
while
some
people
think it is a freedom for
people
to join hazardous
sports
. Both sides of view will be discussed in the essay. In my opinion, I believe that it is wrong if
people
cannot make a decision about what kind of
sports
they want to participate
.
Change preposition
in.
show examples
When it comes to challenging
sports
, some
people
think it should be illegal for individuals to attend because everyone should cherish their own life.
For instance
, scuba diving may be seen as a dangerous sport which is a popular activity in Taiwan. It is reported that as long as the pressure in the depth-sea is uncontrolled,
people
are faced with a life threat at any second. Some countries actually forbid tourists from diving in
a certain areas
Correct the article-noun agreement
certain areas
a certain area
show examples
such
as Vietnam.
On the other hand
, it is a way for
people
to express their various personalities when they attend high-risk
sports
. Humans have the right to make a choice about whether they want to join or not. Take me as an example. I am an outdoor person who enjoys to climb on a mountain or even surf at the beach. I cannot imagine it is not a legal activity one day, what else I can do during my spare time?
Moreover
, when I was in the mountains and sea, which is the only way for me to feel my vivid life. In conclusion,
although
risky
sports
should be stopped for some
people
. But from my perspective, I do not think it is the right decision to make since I believe that it should be free for individuals.
Submitted by blair.chang975640 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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