IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Some scientists think that computers will soon become more intelligent than humans. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#scientists #computers #humans
There is no doubt that the usage of technology
such
 as
computers
 has become one of the most important contributors
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 different aspects of our life.
However
,
computers
 have other disadvantages that might affect us negatively. I believe that
computers
 might be smarter than humans in the future. First of all,
computers
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 become useful for us during the
last
 few years as it helps us to run various errands in a short period of time. Nowadays, it is easier to build new friendships and get to know
cultures
Correct article usage
the cultures
show examples
 of many countries.
For instance
, recently the majority of
people
 agree that getting to make online friends is a fabulous thing to do.
Not to mention
 that it helps us to learn new languages that would benefit us.
For example
, now it is convenient to travel to different countries with no need to worry about language barriers.
Although
computers
 have advantages that seriously ease our life,
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 can be very dangerous to use. As a matter of
fact
Add a comma
,fact
show examples
computers
 are intelligent, and some
people
 might use them to hack
people
's
account
Fix the agreement mistake
accounts
show examples
.
For example
, using
computers
 can harm
people
's business. Another key point, some
people
 may use
computers
 in cyberbullying and that would affect the mental health of the victim.
To sum up
,
computers
 are a double-edged sword that can affect our
live
Replace the word
lives
show examples
 positively or negatively, but it is our decision to make and choose.
Computers
 are great assistants so using them will make our duties easier and will save a lot of time and effort.
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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • artificial intelligence (AI)
  • machine learning
  • emotional intelligence
  • technological singularity
  • ethical concerns
  • job displacement
  • autonomous systems
  • augmented reality
  • cognitive computing
  • data privacy
  • algorithmic bias
  • human-machine collaboration
  • technophobia
  • innovation
  • adaptive systems
  • robotic automation
  • ethical reasoning
  • computational limitations
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