Some people today feel that physical money will no longer be used in the future. Others feel it will still have some uses. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

#people #money #future

Nowadays, thanks to the innovation of technology in banking, credit

cards

, online banking systems and so on tend to replace paper

money

However

, other people think that

cash

could still be useful and impossible to

be disappeared

Wrong verb form

disappear

show examples

This

essay will demonstrate both of those views and my personal

idea

Fix the agreement mistake

ideas

show examples

for

this

argument. On the one hand, there are several benefits that unphysical

cash

brings to human beings nowadays. First of all, it reduces the chance of receiving fake

money

which

creates

Verb problem

show examples

extremely dangerous to people

in particular

, it

also

impacts the economy of a country.

Moreover

, when unreal

money

is brought to other countries, the damage is becoming a worldwide problem.

Secondly

, online banking allows users to transfer or get paid faster than

cash

. It takes only a few minutes to accomplish a transaction

while

it takes days to receive payment in paper

money

On the other hand

, physical

money

has been used since ancestors knew how to trade for food. It

was

Verb problem

played

show examples

an essential role in the economic development of the world. There

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

a number of positive outcomes that

remains

Correct subject-verb agreement

remain

show examples

Firstly

cash

is a form of payment which is easily used by almost everyone, from kids to elders. It could be tough for kids to know how much

money

they have left in the account to use the

cash

card since they are limited to mobile phone access. There are some situations in

that

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

credit

cards

can not help their users to process the payment

such

as unstable Internet connection, or broken or damaged

cards

That is

one of the reasons why

cash

can not be replaced completely. In conclusion,

while

it is true that credit

cards

are becoming more popular in the market as they bring a variety of benefits to users,

however

cash

still plays an important role in our

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

in some ways.

Submitted by jakedth162 on Fri Mar 10 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response

Task Response: The essay addresses both sides of the argument but lacks a clear opinion. Ensure to include a clear personal opinion in the conclusion.

coherence cohesion

Coherence and Cohesion: The logical structure of the essay is somewhat clear, but the introduction and conclusion need improvement to better illustrate the writer's opinion. Ensure to use cohesive devices to link ideas and improve paragraph development and organization.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

308 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

financial security
safety net
unforeseen circumstances
emergencies
future investments
retirement planning
financial discipline
habit of saving
amassing wealth
substantial fund
opportunity cost
additional income
inflation
purchasing power

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
With the growing population of cities, more and more people live in homes that have little or no outdoor area. Is this a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.
In the modern era, the population in certain nations is increasing at an incredible rate. Well, due to more occupants, the rate of houses built with no outdoor areas is increasing and a part of the society believes that it is a positive development of the country but remaining to reject the notion. According to my opinion, the latter view seems to be more significant so, the reasons behind this will be explicated in upcoming paragraphs. Thus, will lead to a logical conclusion as well.
5.5
band
The plans below show the ground floor of a library in 2001 and how it was redeveloped in 2009.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The floor plans of a library in 2001 and its redevelopment in 2009 are depicted below, showing significant alterations in the layout.
5.5
band
For many people the reason they work hard is to earn money. to what extent do you agree or disagree?
There is no doubt these days that hard work is the predominant reason to be wealthy, which is one of the way to raise the income. The question is, do many people work extra time to get more money or not? In this essay, I am going to discuss both views and draw my own opinion.
6.5
band
Some people feel that learning a foreign languageis an essential component of a child's education. Others feel that learning a foreign language is often a waste of time that can be better spent on learning technologyand other vocational subjects.
People have different perceptions when it comes to their children's education. Some want them to learn at least one foreign dialect as that will help them in their overall development whereas, others believe that instead of focussing on a completely new speech, children should put all their efforts into learning the trade courses that are available in their nation as this will help them to have a better career in future.
5
band
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Nowadays, people have more higher education, it makes the society seriously competitive. There are few people agruing that competition makes people motivated at company, at school and in daily rutine. However, other people believe that assisting and cooperating with each other is more significant than competing against other people. From my perspective, helping each other is the best way in the society.

Some people today feel that physical money will no longer be used in the future. Others feel it will still have some uses. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

With the growing population of cities, more and more people live in homes that have little or no outdoor area. Is this a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

The plans below show the ground floor of a library in 2001 and how it was redeveloped in 2009.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

For many people the reason they work hard is to earn money. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people feel that learning a foreign languageis an essential component of a child's education. Others feel that learning a foreign language is often a waste of time that can be better spent on learning technologyand other vocational subjects.

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.