Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Due to
the blessing of technology, the price of cutting-edge devices is more reasonable. With that image in mind,
children
nowadays might have their own
smartphones
. Without any
time
limitation, they spend a substantial
time
on their gadgets which leads to negative effects, in my perspective.
In addition
, I will explain the reasons
further
.
To begin
, there are several reasons
that
Correct word choice
why
show examples
toward
Change preposition
apply
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kids spend a fortune of
time
on
smartphones
.
Firstly
, lacking
the
Correct article usage
a
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physical playground where they tend to do recreational activities.
That is
the prohibition leads to
children
being hooked on
smartphones
for on-screen entertainment.
For example
, I technically spent more
time
on outdoor activities compared to my nephew . He lacks the playground areas, so he grabs his phone and starts to play games. Another reason
children
overspend their
time
on
smartphones
is the limitation of prevention from their
parents
. It
also
means they are responsible for the
time
their offsprings consume on their phones. To illustrate, my
parents
used to allow me only one hour per day unless I had finished my homework. These days, because of
strict
Correct article usage
the strict
show examples
rules from my
parents
, I am not a slave to
smartphones
. Overtime consumption of
smartphones
has some negative effects on
children
's life. First and foremost, it apparently wastes
time
on unnecessary activities
such
as video games or social network platforms. Taking my colleagues who are being addictives to Facebook and Instagram as an example, every working day, I can count they only
spending
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spend
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two hours on practical work, the remaining
time
they search about celebrities scandals on Facebook and doom-scrolling on Instagram. The second harmful impact on
children
's health is
occurred
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occurring
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, especially their eyes. If they overspent on digital screens they would have eye issues soon, namely optical relations. At the bottom line,
children
cannot access their loved playgrounds could lead them to overspend on their
smartphones
.
In addition
,
parents
do not limit their
time
kids' usage of phones is
also
a primary issue. As far as I'm concerned, wasting
time
and eye issues are the negative repercussions if
children
overlook smartphone screens.
Submitted by Hoang Nguyen on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • smartphones
  • usage
  • technology
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • entertainment
  • gaming
  • social media
  • communication
  • educational resources
  • addiction
  • dependence
  • negative effects
  • physical health
  • mental health
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