IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

You are going to travel abroad for two months and while you are away a friend would like to live in your apartment. Write to the owner of the apartment explaining the situation. In your letter: explain that you are going to travel abroad, describe your friend and say why he/she would be a good tenant, ask whether the owner will agree to this.

Dear Sir/Madam, I am writing to let you know that I am going to be away for a
while
Linking Words
 as I have
finally
Linking Words
 got some time off from my job. I plan to travel abroad for two months as I want to visit a large number of countries in Europe that I always dreamt
to see
Change preposition
of seeing
show examples
.
Although
Linking Words
 I
am
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 going to be missing for a
while
Linking Words
, I didn’t want to leave the house without a care.
That is
Linking Words
 why I managed to convince my friend Michael for housekeeping during my absence. He is a very responsible man and a person that I could always rely on as our friendship
lasts
Wrong verb form
has lasted
show examples
 for ten years now.
For instance
Linking Words
, Michael has worked as a babysitter for a long time so he has experience in taking care of things. Please, tell me if you agree to these changes we will need to come up with an alternative solution. I look forward to hearing from you. Yours faithfully, Daniel Abrosimov

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task achievement
Consider adding a clearer introduction that outlines the purpose of your letter more explicitly.
coherence and cohesion
Try to connect your ideas more smoothly between paragraphs for better flow.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to check for small grammatical inaccuracies to improve clarity and professionalism.
task achievement
You effectively explained your trip and introduced your friend as a potential tenant.
task achievement
Your tone is polite and suitable for the context of the letter.

The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

  • Dear + name
  • Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

  • Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
  • Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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