People naturally resist making changes in their lives. What kind of problems can this cause? What solutions can you suggest?
Nowadays, as people are exposed to diverse environments and situations, their mindsets on a particular topic can vary.
However
, individuals who find it difficult to adapt to changes are often labelled as "conservatives." Their perspective of the world mainly focuses on stability and the preservation of current entities and objects. Unbeknownst to them, their perception and understanding of life may be detrimental. Problems regarding certain topics, such
as romantic relationships, work, family, and overall
satisfaction can arise if individuals do not allow for alterations.
When people resist changes in some aspects of life, things can become difficult and uncontrollable. For example
, when a couple realizes that their romantic relationship has many flaws and misunderstandings that they cannot resolve, the best option is for them to part ways. However
, if one party refuses to accept and make changes, violent acts may occur due to
further
disagreements. Refusing to adapt can also
lead to issues at work, such
as procrastination in the form of burnout syndrome, or even avoidable fights with colleagues. Moreover
, it can create rifts in the family through quarrels and inappropriate actions.
Nevertheless
, conflicts could potentially be avoided if conservatives shifted their perspectives to become more liberal and open-minded. By viewing the world as a constantly changing utopia and allowing for some reflection time, they can reconsider their thoughts and seek counselling, resulting in mindsets that will benefit them in the future.
In conclusion, people can have different points of view on a particular topic, but they must constantly adapt their thoughts to live their lives to the fullest without any regrets.Submitted by ativich_2549 on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay has a logical structure with clear transition words and phrases to connect ideas. As an examiner, I noticed the essay lacked smooth transitions between points which can disrupt the flow.
coherence cohesion
While the introduction and conclusion were present, they could be stronger. A more engaging introduction and a compelling conclusion are needed for a high band score.
coherence cohesion
Your main points were supported, but they require deeper analysis and more development. Elaborate on your ideas with additional explanation and discussion to meet the IELTS standards.
task achievement
It's important to provide a complete response to the prompt. The task requires discussing the problems caused by resisting change and suggesting solutions. You touched on this but did not delve deeply enough into the solutions.
task achievement
Your ideas are on the right track but need to be expressed more clearly and comprehensively. Aim for clarity and detail in your writing to fully convey your message.
task achievement
Specific examples are sparse in your essay. Please include more relevant examples to effectively illustrate your points. This adds credibility and depth to your writing, which is crucial for higher band scores.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.