IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

the two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010.

the two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010.
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the two maps illustrate how the
road
Use synonyms
 ran through a
city
Use synonyms
 hospital between 2007 and 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen in the maps, the
city
Use synonyms
 hospital underwent a considerable transformation over the given period. In 2007, a
city
Use synonyms
 hospital had many empty lands and no facilities sufficiently.
However
Linking Words
, there had three main roads, a ring
road
Use synonyms
 which was on the north side of a
city
Use synonyms
 hospital, it had emerged with hospital
road
Use synonyms
 and a
city
Use synonyms
road
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, there had a
bus
Use synonyms
 stop nearby a hospital
road
Use synonyms
 and
also
Linking Words
 a car park for officers and the public close to the
bus
Use synonyms
 stop on the right-hand side of the hospital
road
Use synonyms
. By 2010, the south of the
city
Use synonyms
 hospital, there had been developed substantially and a ring
road
Use synonyms
 has been connected with the hospital
road
Use synonyms
 by roundabouts the
bus
Use synonyms
 station was constructed in the southeast of the
city
Use synonyms
 hospital which replaced a
bus
Use synonyms
 stop.
Additionally
Linking Words
, a public car park was built on the northeast side,
while
Linking Words
 the staff car park remained in the same place as in the year 2007.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words road, city, bus with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • accessibility
  • dual carriageway
  • roundabout
  • traffic flow
  • multi-story car park
  • green spaces
  • pedestrian provisions
  • footpaths
  • traffic signals
  • construction phase
  • ambulances
  • carriageway expansion
  • traffic congestion
  • pedestrian crossings
  • urban planning
  • infrastructure development
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