Some people believe that watching TV and playing computer games should be limited and substituted by reading books. Do you agree or disagree? Give your opinion.

#people #tv #computer #games #books

nowadays the consumption of media and playing computer

games

increase significantly

while

some groups have a negative attitude towards that and say we should alternate by encouraging people to read

books

. in

this

essay, I want to discuss the advantages and disadvantages of these opinions and in conclusion, I say my opinion. on the one hand, there are those who

subdcribes

Correct your spelling

subscribes

this

view that there are some merits to

usage

Add an article

the usage

show examples

of media and playing computers. from

this

point of view, they believe there are several

games

or tv programs that they have to think about that and it has some useful data.

for example

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

strategic

games

are able to provide

think

Wrong verb form

thinking

show examples

about management.

additionally

, there are some tv programs that have good data about the past or the future.

such

as historical movies or science programs.

however

, I do not find

this

argument valid because most

user

Change to a plural noun

users

show examples

don't

Change the verb form

doesn't

show examples

attention to

the

Change the word

their

show examples

benefits of them,

moreover

they

playing

Wrong verb form

play

show examples

watching

Wrong verb form

watch

show examples

just for fun not to increase

knowledge

Correct pronoun usage

their knowledge

show examples

that is

merit far from

mind

Correct article usage

the mind

show examples

on the other hand

, many commentators justifiably argue that there are several positive points when we replace media and computer

games

with

books

also

, they insist that people are able to get more and quicker information from

books

in addition

, from an educational perspective reading

books

have highly beneficial to students. it is

also

maintained that most students who

habite

Correct your spelling

hate

to reading

books

have a better result in education through the pupils who spend their time with tv or

games

are less result. in sum , there are minor merits with

first

Change the article

the first

show examples

Assumption, so I strongly agree to altern reading

books

its

Replace the word

it's

it is

show examples

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

positive aspects are noticeable.

Submitted by amirhsina on Mon Mar 13 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

282 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

leisure time
passive entertainment
active mental engagement
foster
complex concepts
screen time
concentration and focus
counterargument
cognitive development
problem-solving skills
balanced approach
diverse media landscape
multi-modal learning

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities.Others, however, say that this would have little affect on public health and other measure are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
In today’s society, some people believe that increasing the number of sports facilities is the best way to enhance public health. However, others argue that this will have only a minor impact, and other measures should be considered. In my opinion, while sports facilities are important, they are not the only solution to improving public health.
7.5
band
In many countries, smoking is now illegal in public places. Many people believe that such a ban is justified. Do you agree or disagree?
Smoking has been banned in public places like parks, hospitals and restaurants in many nations, and it is a law that many people support. I agree with this initiative because it reduces the harmful effects of passive smoking and also encourages smokers to quit.
<4
band
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, the products made by sugar are increased and also people use this sugarly things in their life. So this days we can see the diseases about food have become common. Becuse of this reasen, many goverments think that it is a good idea to rise price of products. In my veiw , disagree with the statment above
7.5
band
The world of work is changing rapidly and employees cannot depend on having the same job or the same working conditions for life. Discuss the possible causes for this rapid change, and suggest ways of preparing people for the world of work in the future.
In the globalisation era, the circumstances at the workplace are consistently shifting, with the aim of conforming to the digital era. With each passing day, the demand for particular roles at work is continuously growing, leading the employer to adjust their place of employment. This essay will elucidate the major triggers of this fast transition, accompanied by several advice for future work staff to combat this environmental alteration.
4.5
band
In many countries around the world young people decide to leave their parents’ home once they finish school. They start living on their own or sharing a home with friends. Is this a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples
There is no denying the fact that a person should depend on himself in period of his life.while it is a commonly held belief that in many countries across the world young people decide to move out from their parents' home once they finish school, they start to living on their own of sharing home with friends. This essay will analyse this topic.

Some people believe that watching TV and playing computer games should be limited and substituted by reading books. Do you agree or disagree? Give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities.Others, however, say that this would have little affect on public health and other measure are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In many countries, smoking is now illegal in public places. Many people believe that such a ban is justified. Do you agree or disagree?

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

The world of work is changing rapidly and employees cannot depend on having the same job or the same working conditions for life. Discuss the possible causes for this rapid change, and suggest ways of preparing people for the world of work in the future.

In many countries around the world young people decide to leave their parents’ home once they finish school. They start living on their own or sharing a home with friends. Is this a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples