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Band 7

We cannot help everyone in tbe world that needs help, so we should only be concerned with our own communities and countries.To what extent do u agree or disagree.

#tbe #world #communities #countries
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There is a common belief that people should limit their help to their own societies and it is not needed to help everyone all over the world. I totally disagree with these ideas. First of all, different countries might face various difficulties over time. If they do not give other societies a hand when in trouble, they cannot expect others to help them when they need help themselves.
For instance
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, China ran out of facial masks during the COVID-19 pandemic and Turkey sent them tons of masks. Later on, an earthquake disaster happened in turkey and China helped them back by sending food and water shelves.
As a result
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, governments should be able to rely on others' assistance by aiding them in the same situations.
Second,
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individuals’ quality of life affects each other’s as well. Families dealing with poverty and disease in their home country are more prone to immigrate to other countries illegally as refugees which put a lot of pressure on those citizens
as well as
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 governments.
Such
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 refugees do not have shelter, lack proper education and
consequently
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, cannot find a good job to earn money. These are all costs for the governments coming out of their own citizen's pockets.
Therefore
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, countries should focus on improving people’s lives in all aspects not only in their own country but
also
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 everywhere else.
To conclude
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, I believe that helping other people regardless of where they live is beneficial for everyone and will come back to us one day. At the same
time
Add a comma
,time
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 if we do not help others, we definitely encounter its consequences in our lives.
Submitted by pardishddi on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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