some people think that to be successful , you need to get in a university degree. where as others say it is not true. discuss both ideas and give your opinion ?

In
this
contemporary era, getting a university degree is
on
Correct your spelling
one
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of
most
Correct article usage
the most
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important
part
Fix the agreement mistake
parts
show examples
of everyone's life. There are some
argue
Correct pronoun usage
who argue
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that being successful is depend on your educational degree.
However
, others advocate that
succeeding
Correct article usage
the succeeding
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process is not
depend
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dependent
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on
academical
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academic
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learning. In
this
essay
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,essay
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I will discuss both views and opine that why academic education is an important point in
this
case. In some public thinking, University
educating
Replace the word
education
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is a kind of preparation for expertise
works
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work
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. In
the
Correct article usage
apply
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colleges and universities,
students
learn a lot of knowledge about what they want to be in future.
For example
,
engineering
Correct word choice
if engineering
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students
pass more than a hundred units in their field and it can make them
expert
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experts
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in their major.
Moreover
, they can know about
newest
Correct article usage
the newest
show examples
details in their field. Professors in faculties, in order to make
students
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students'
student's
show examples
information fresh, try to give some
homeworks
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homework
them
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to them
show examples
,
for instance
, some
works
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work
show examples
like studying new articles. It makes
students
up-to-date about their majors.
Therefore
, they have a lot of fresh
scentific
Correct your spelling
scientific
knowledge in their degree. On the other side, some people say that university is not important for
successfulness
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success
show examples
. they believe that it is enough to have
capability
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the capability
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or
efforts
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effort
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for being a successful person. It is true that capability and effort is two necessary
section
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sections
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to succeed,
This
group claim that if you be ingenious and interested in your interests you can learn easily everything that you want, as a case of
this
point, you can study books by yourself and contribute in some courses,but in fact
in my opinion
Add the comma(s)
, in my opinion,
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it is not enough and you will waste a lot of time or money,
therefore
your achievements are not adequate. In conclusion, there are two different views about
usefulness
Add an article
the usefulness
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of academic education in
successfulness
Replace the word
success
show examples
, I believe
Submitted by arsalan.azizzadeh on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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