The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree ?

Undoubtedly, working at
this
time
is becoming harder
due to
the company's compulsory,
While
it is a commonly held belief that employees deserve longer weekends as their hard-working. There is
also
an argument that opposes it. From my perspective,
workers
should take more vacations to improve their mental health.
To begin
with, improving mental health requires
workers
to relax and chill. It is
also
possible to say that well-being comes from relaxation.
Consequently
, it enhances the capability of flexible
work
and job satisfaction.
Furthermore
, the ability to spend more
time
with their families and friends will improve.
For example
, there is a study showed that 68% of companies today are focusing on redeveloping their duty
time
so their
workers
have more
time
doing their hobbies and staying relaxed.
Nonetheless
,
this
method is showing good results, and many
workers
are becoming more active and starting to achieve their job goals. Another point to consider is the benefits reaching not only the employees But
also
the company itself.
Moreover
, the majority of companies are requesting active
workers
, and they have to apply the idea of minimal
work
days
as a result
of
workers
complaining about their mental anxiety.
Moreover
, almost all of the associations in the world today have started to develop their jobs and make them online
due to
the worker's comfort.
For instance
, a great company called AISE focuses on improving labourers'
work
period, and the statistics showed that 99 per cent of their association's
work
is completed by their well-begin labourers. In conclusion, despite people having different views, I believe that it is significant to improve flexible
work
time
for
workers
' mental health.
However
, most associations today successfully make flexibilities in duty
work
by developing them into online
work
.
Submitted by ferasmirza11 on

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task achievement
Ensure that your introduction clearly outlines what your essay will cover. Simplifying the introduction to summarize both perspectives briefly could make it more effective.
task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples to support your points. For example, mention names of companies, studies, or actual data from case studies to add credibility.
task achievement
Address the opposing argument more clearly to present a balanced view. Briefly explain why some might disagree and refute those points with your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Work on enhancing paragraph transitions to link your ideas more seamlessly and improve overall flow.
coherence cohesion
Strengthen the logical connection between the arguments and the conclusion to enhance unity and cohesion.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which outlines the viewpoint and summarizes the main points effectively.
coherence cohesion
There are coherent arguments presented to support the idea of a shorter working week for better mental health.
task achievement
The topic is directly addressed, and the response clearly indicates your standpoint in favor of shorter working weeks.
task achievement
The essay explores benefits not only for employees but extends the thought to how companies benefit, showing depth.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • productivity
  • burnout
  • motivation
  • mental well-being
  • work-life balance
  • job satisfaction
  • pollution levels
  • traffic congestion
  • consumer spending
  • economic implications
  • leisure and service sectors
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