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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Nowadays individual take their family with them to abroad whenever they go for a business trip. What are the advantages and disadvantages on individual and on his/her family?

#business #trip
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It is thought by some that
the
Correct article usage
apply
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family
trips
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 these days are incredibly common. Now, some people believe that family
trips
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 are better than travelling alone,
while
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 others oppose
this
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 trend. There are several benefits and drawbacks
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
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 approach. One evident merit is the exposure to the different
cultureWhen
Correct your spelling
culture when
families
Use synonyms
 are travelling together, they better understand the traditions and values of that specific country. To illustrate,
last
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 time when
i
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I
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 went to
dubai
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Dubai
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 with my family ,
i
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I
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 have acquired
bundle
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a bundle
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if
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of
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 information about the
muslim
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Muslim
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 community like how they greet
and
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me and
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 what are their eating habits.Another key consideration is to break the monotony among the
families
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. The
families
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 who
travel
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 together are much
stable
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more stable
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 and tend to have
a
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apply
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minor family
issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
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 as they spend quality time
each
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with each
show examples
 other during the trip,
thus
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the
Correct your spelling
they
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cooperative
Replace the word
cooperate
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 and understand each other well. To illustrate, One
if
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of
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 the researchers have claimed that people who
travel
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 with their kids and
families
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 do not possess any family issues as compared to
the
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apply
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other people.
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However
Add a comma
,However
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 there are some obvious demerits of family
trips
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 .
Firstly
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,
financial
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the financial
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 burden is
the
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a
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 major concern. Family
trips
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way
Add a missing verb
are way
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 more expensive than travelling alone.
For instance
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,
of
Correct your spelling
if
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 a businessman
travel
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, he can pay for himself.
While
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,
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apply
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 accommodation for the
families
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are
Change the verb form
is
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 out of budget sometimes.
Secondly
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, security is at risk. It is quite hard to look after all the family members during the vacation. To better explains it, any toddler will require
a
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apply
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special treatment as not the hotels and
travel
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 companies
doe snot
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do not
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 provide everything together for
family’s
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the family’s
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 convenience. In conclusion,
while
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 there are some positive consequences of travelling with family, the negative outcomes can never be neglected at any cost.
Submitted by Navneet Dhand on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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