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Writing Samples /
Band 6

People believe that not all school children have the natural ability to learn a new language schools should not force school children to study a foreign language. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #school #children #ability #language #schools #force #study
Nowadays, learning and speaking one or two foreign
languages
 is a trend. Some people usually let their children study some
languages
 for competitiveness.
However
, other humans dissent from the opinion of studying new
languages
. They think adults should not force students to do things they do not want to. From my perspective, I partially agree with the latter position. Humans
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
argue that not forcing students to learn a foreign language indicates every person has their
specialties
Change the spelling
specialities
show examples
, and compelling them to do unproficiency is not a relevant method.
Moreover
, they are not proficient in
languages
 because of physical problems or detachment.
For example
, some learners may be born to be not excellent at vocabulary
as well as
 grammar.
In other words
, their brain is not able to deal with words or something.
Therefore
,
this
 kind of student is in a disadvantaged situation. As far as I am concerned, I suggest parents or schools can not ask learners to learn
languages
due to
 inherent difficulties in the human body. If adults insist on improvement, it may bring about unfavourable results
instead
.
However
, if the subject is not relative to their natural ability, I feel learners should attempt to expose themself to some
languages
 under the condition without any oppression from seniors. After all, acquainting ourselves with some
languages
 can benefit us,
for instance
, whether making international friends or taking journeys requires
this
 kind of talent. In a nutshell, learning non-mother
languages
 is not an easy thing, and it may frustrate some humans who learn it.
Additionally
, it is futile for school teachers to try to repeat those teachings despite the fact that there are many merits of
languages
. Ultimately, it is better for parents to get hold of their children's abilities and decide if learning
languages
 is really appropriate or not.
Submitted by hayashidajinja820 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that all ideas are expressed clearly and directly. Some phrases, like 'compelling them to do unproficiency is not a relevant method,' could be rephrased for clarity.
task achievement
Try to develop more specific examples to support points. While the essay provides general reasons, more detailed examples would enhance arguments.
introduction conclusion present
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the argument.
task achievement
You provide a balanced view by acknowledging both sides of the argument.
supported main points
The essay addresses different aspects of the issue, such as personal ability and benefits of language learning, which shows a nuanced understanding.

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